After the 9/11 attacks a study was done with students in urban Detroit. It found their anxiety level had not changed much. But I have heard friends and colleagues speak of the radical change in their lives after 9/11, a new sense of urgency or even fearfulness as though they had not expect this could happen "here" or to "us" or to "me".  But these children in the crumbing inner-city of Detroit had never had such illusions, because their neighborhoods and schools were not safe long before Sandy Hook. Nearly all had had a near relative either killed or seriously injured in their run-of-the-mill chaotic world. They had seen teens try to avoid being involved in lawlessness only to be harmed by those they sought with a whole heart to avoid. They had seen parents and grandparents struggle with grinding poverty, crumbling school buildings, jobs fleeing the city, and the ever present specter of being one emergency away from homelessness, less than enough food or falling into an overcrowded foster care system.

For some of us, our beloved parent, trusted life-partner or dearly loved child begins making choices that cause concern; slowly trust is eroded and the relationship changes as a result long before the problem is generally known. Other times folks put on a "good face" and the sudden fall from respected community leader finds even their nearest and dearest wholly unprepared. Either way the new reality of legal troubles, financial ruin and public disgrace comes as a shock to family and friends. If it is a sufficiently public event we may have a camera and microphone shoved in our face when we are still reeling from the shock and the questions that trail into the years ahead, "How did this happen?" "What could I have done to prevent this?" And maybe eventually, as we share the journey of other families dealing with criminal behavior and/or incarceration, we begin to say, "Thank God it was not worse".

However it comes, a crime, news of a crime, response to a crime touches hundreds of lives from survivors to law enforcement to the person arrested, to the courtroom personnel and defense personnel, to the jail and prison personnel, to social workers and medical workers educators and community members who have to deal with the multiple layers of response and then add the families of each and every one of these folks who are touched in the ever widening circles of anxiety, expense, emotional exhaustion and destruction of one small act. It is not an act of kindness or courage that might be acknowledged by a grateful recipient, but rather acts of carelessness and wanton selfishness that get no benefit from the tsunami of damage it releases.

This is why it is so important to be thoughtful, the current buzz word is "mindful" of our choices. There are just too many people living in the aftermath of a moment, a choice that is remembered with confusion and pain and the cry "But I never intended for it to go that far!"

We each need to make a personal decision to "do no harm" as we seek response to the challenges of our culture, our lives is a step in the right direction, because reacting (rather than responding) can boost us right into legal trouble in a nanosecond. And the circles of destruction get a boost we never intended.

I had so hoped after the election we would have a space where sound bites and instant analysis would give way to well researched factual information. But months latter we still seem we take the latest "hot" news and have it ground out over days with every rumor reported, but little valuable information provided.  Even false rumors seem to get a Rosana-Bananadana-esque "Never mind" rather than a clear retraction aired with corrections seeming to air for a fraction of the time spent pouring wild erroneous rumor mongering into our ears and eyes. We ruin reputations based on what someone or their family member did decades ago, but don't blink when people with clout are not held accountable in the most blatant and public misbehavior....just give them a golden parachute and send them on their way or announce they are going into "rehab" for whatever decades old crimes might have been uncovered -- whether a CEO or a politician or a media big shot or a star sports figure or a plunderer of charity funds. 

I do thank God for the freedom of the internet to access a wide array of foreign news sources and credible research information so at least I can hear a broader perspective. But it only helps a little since this all just seems so insane. And into this has poured hurricanes, the catastrophe that is Puerto Rico, earthquakes, drought and raging fires, international political intrigue and tensions, and the barrage of shots fired in Las Vegas that rivals the Murrah Federal Building explosion in stirring fear. I can't say I am surprised that some folks wonder if this is "final days."

But amid the news cycle and the weather challenges and the human loss and despair we stand with the same choice we had a week ago or a month ago or a year ago. Do we turn to God and seek comfort and wisdom and courage to be God's hands and feet to a hurting world? Or do we continue to rely on our own understanding, which frankly I believe leads only to despair and a desperate sort of selfishness?

Will you turn outward toward God, and chose to act as God's servant to God's people? Or will you turn inward where fear causes pain to fester and wounds to grow more dangerous?

May the Lord of peace himself give you peace always in every way. The Lord be with all of you. 2 Thessalonians 3: 16

I was reading a list of services our government has identified that would help former foster care residents to avoid arrest and/or incarceration, dropping out of school, getting pregnant, getting abducted or inveighed into sexual bondage, destroying their financial assets and damaging their financial future, impairing their employability or any of a laundry list of other baggage that a child with a tattered or shattered childhood does not need.

It makes me think about how much I learned in my teens and into my adult years from advice and counsel from my parents, grandparents and extended family. I had older and wiser counsel and practical help in recovering from mistakes. I was given second chances because someone coached me in how to navigate the business world or how to recover when I had failed to meet government requirements like licensing and taxing laws. 

Even the best foster parents, overwhelmed with on-going challenges and government forms and stretching dollars often don't think far enough ahead; if they do, experience has taught them that they have a too high likelihood of not having an extended relationship with their wards.  Some states "require" children "aging out" of foster care have a transition plan. Ironically in most states that is required to start less than a year (one said 90 days) before the aging out event. Does this seem sensible? Can we "instant teach" budgeting, how to read a pay stub, how and when to file taxes, what to do if you have a legal dispute (landlord, EEOC, child support, running afoul of infractions, misdemeanors or some class F felonies for example) where legal aid is not provided. How often do they sit down to teach a teenager how to fill out an employment application or help them do a mock interview? Do they have the resources to instruct on how to avoid a scam or what to do if you suspect a scam? Do they help them get together the documents that they will need in life such as birth certificates, state IDs or driver's licenses, health history, or contact information for extended family? Do they have materials to help them understand how to register for college or apply to take a GED? Do they understand how to access health care or how to manage their own health issues? Pretty sure their ability to help develop an ethical or spiritual base is frowned upon as most references I have found are wholly secular.

There are thousands of things my folks taught me (though much is more complicated now). But there were lots of things they knew, and they had years to introduce me to things like political issue research and to model voting regularly. They were active in their communities and churches in trying to give a hand up to folks who were struggling. When I moved to another state after more than 50 years living where I grew up, I was amazed at how much I suddenly didn't know from how to get help for an abandoned pet, to traffic law differences, to how the local government worked, to where to call for many small problems and challenges. This makes me feel great concern for young people who can not be making much more than minimum wage, are likely targets for scams and abuse, and are PTSD prone considering that Happy Days are not the launching pad for foster care. They often have physical and mental health issues that make access to medical care imperative and complicated.  

I have stumbled. My family members have stumbled. We consulted; we researched, we reached out to each other and our extended families to find our way through. We were anxious, lonely, conflicted and family was there for us. Foster "graduates" may have some family support, but often the extended family is struggling too with broken relationships, financial hardship, limited education and narrow life experiences. Too often foster care does not or can not foster building closer ties with birth families.

Who stands for these young men; who stands with these young women who have already known more sorrow and poverty and distress than many of us know in a lifetime.

​Again my tax dollars are making things worse rather than better and my church speaks of long-range goals and allocation of resources.

There are so many horrors on the news in recent weeks, from hurricanes to earthquakes to mass shootings. It is enough to entice us all to give up helping as there are just too many needs.

But we must persevere with hope. Of course we need to be careful about the goals we set. I am certain that heads of drug cartels and corrupt corporations and those folks whose political careers led to news conference pictures of head-hanging shame all had plenty of "grit" and passion and perseverance.

But here is the deal. If the we who are working to improve communities, to be solid (though of course not perfect) parents; who are learning from the wise folks, encouraging and help others in their good efforts; learning, acting, loving with hands and feet; advocating and working for justice: if we give up, will things get better? Will you have more hope? Will you give up on other difficult things like being friends with broken folks, or walking with the sad, distress, wounded who share our space, even when they are family? children?

Some are called to increasing responsibilities on boards, councils, committees supporting social justice and political action. Some write books or songs. Some make speeches to and personally advocate with folks who can make better decision for our communities and countries. Some are called to write a note; make a phone call; to assure the man waiting at the VA that he is seen, the woman in line to visit a loved one in jail that she is heard; to be the one who reaches out to heal a rift. 

I know you are a perfectly fine lady or gent, but frankly, that is just not enough. I know it is scary, even overwhelming, but it is so worth it. If you can make just one life better, it will make your own life better. If you can lead the charge for better conditions for the poor, the under-educated, the vulnerable on a larger scale, is your reluctance so great that you can lay your abilities, your praying voice, your intellect, your physical capacities aside when it is your loved one who might be blessed, even it is in a generation yet unborn?

We need to heed where our tax dollars are spent, to hold political folks, social service agencies, educators, law enforcement accountable. But we must first BE accountable. And we need to remember that folks who need to be held accountable are human beings with their own burdens and challenges. So we need to forgo railing at bad apples, in favor of offering to be a part of the solution.

If you are a member of a church and they can't help you connect to an opportunity to be a force for positive change, then change churches or advocate for them to step up or call the United Way or any other agency that tugs on your heart! Look around at your neighbors, family, church family, friends, co-workers for ideas. Pay attention to the local political legislation and advocacy efforts and speak out for those who have compromised voices. Leave your ego at home and really listen wherever you go and God will give you ears and grow your heart and take your abilities and infuse them with His Power and His Wisdom.

I promise.