Do not be like a horse or a mule, without understanding, whose temper must be curbed with bit and bridle, else it will not stay near you. (Psalm 32:9) Oh, how I hate when the daily devotion is aimed directly at my so imperfect heart. And, yes, I love it too, because it is a reminder of how tender is God's care of me.

I've been asked to give a talk on a subject that hits a bit close to home, which, just like this blog, calls me to be authentic and that requires an often painful honesty with myself.

You see, I am attracted to the idea of being a sincere and committed follower of Jesus Christ, but sometimes I'd just rather be comfortable -- you know, go to church, help out a bit, find a fun study group and then, filled with self-righteous complaisance go home and put my feet up.

Instead, the more involved I get the more I realize I have something to offer, that I can make a difference and the price is my self-satisfied, self-indulgence in things not all that important in the bigger picture. God has given me a life with so many blessings and I'd like to believe it is because I deserve it; but how can I be "better" or "more worthy" than the billions of people who live with far less comfort and options than I have?

Is is possible that I have been given more because I'm expected to do more? Not a very comfortable thought, but maybe not an unfair one. 

God, O God, how narrow is my view and selfish my natural instincts. I'd like to do "enough" to be filled with pride in my "goodness," but I'm so afraid if I know You better, get closer to You, You are going to expect me to do more. Of course, when I do get moving and "do more" I am always blessed beyond expectation and drawn yet closer to You. So I don't know why I am inconstantly dragging my own puffed up sense of my "right to have it easy" around getting in the way of all the good things You have planned for me. Dear Lord, please help me get out of my own way. AMEN  PS - Thanks for being so patient with me!

It seems that in all of recorded history humankind has struggled with the notion that every unfortunate experience is someone's fault. We know that poor choices have contributed to the challenges some face, but we don't really want to ask ourselves how we managed to be more able to avoid bad choices. Sometimes the answer is easy because we had attentive, able parents and others who taught us, coached us, and held us accountable in love.

But we also know people with crumby situations early in life who found a path to productive, joy-filled lives. And we know folks who seem to have every advantage yet seem determined to plunge down the slopes of self-destruction at world record speeds.

So it seems to me that the question is about this: an early mentor of mine sought "coachable" folks to work with. This is an attitude that includes the following notions:(I) I don't know everything about anything. (2) I'm able to develop abilities, skills and a pool of wisdom about what I need to live well. (3) I'm willing to at least consider seriously information placed before me and see how it might inform what I am trying to accomplish.

So, when I am coachable, I thank God. And where I have not been willing to accept instruction in the past, I rejoice that the choice is mine and I can change. One of the gifts God gives us is discernment (making wise choices) and discerning who to rely on for information is an important blessing. No one individual (or group) knows everything about everything, so I strive to learn at least a little something from every person I encounter. And when I find someone willing to share their expertise and perspective generously, I try to be the best student I can be. 

I believe that God blesses me by the good people He has placed in my life, by the skills I have and by what I don't yet know, because learning is a lifelong journey. I never know what interesting, insightful, comforting, or challenging new thing is just around the next corner or past the next intersection.

All Wise and Knowing God, thank You for all the blessings and challenges that You have allowed into my life. You teach me every day how reliable, how trustworthy You are and give me courage to expand my world through learning and doing new things in ways that bless Your children here on Earth. AMEN

As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind? Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him."  John 9:1-3 

There is so much brokenness in families. We see it in high divorce rates and in grandparents raising grandchildren. But we are foolish if we think this is a new problem. Even St, Paul admonished in writing to the Colossians (recorded in chapter 3, verse 21), Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart.

How many children do we see who loose heart? For those who work among the incarcerated or homeless populations it is a daily issue. It is also a problem where schools do not finds ways to meet their responsibility to educate and where hunger is a part of school failures. Our culture demands children "keep up with the Jones" in new and frustrating ways so children whose families are struggling financially suffer both from financial want and again at the hands of children and adults who value them based on the clothes they wear and the electronics they own.

Those of us who embrace the teachings of Jesus dare not turn away from the challenges of the children who are our future citizens. It is not only foolish and dangerous, it is directly in conflict with the words Jesus spoke and the way He lived and the actions He took.

All churches have a responsibility to welcome and support young families, single parents, grandparents with extraordinary responsibilities for a grandchild or grandchildren. A hundred years ago the death of a parent was far more common and many children in orphanages had a living parent who could not both financially support a minor child and care for that minor child. The details have changed, but we are still called to be kind and helpful and responsive to "widows and orphans" no matter how the loss occurred. And where possible, we need to provide support and restoration where a missing parent seeks to gently rebuild relationships and return to a productive place in the community.

When we stand in loco parentis with disheartened children, we all need to bring our best game, long-term commitment and a heart to be the hands and feet of God.

We all win when children are treated with dignity and given the tools to lead productive, Christ-centered lives.

Is it just me or does it seems we all have a tale of woe? I don't mean that every one whines about their miserably hard life because of pretty inconsequential stuff, although that happens too much too. I just mean that when we truly trust each other enough to share our story there always seems to be challenges and sorrows and losses that are not apparent on the surface of even the most "together" and "with it" people.

So why do we all play the game where we pretend we have always been Practically Perfect In Every Way? For those of us who love God and deeply appreciate the mess of a life we had before we began leaning how to receive the blessings of the Spirit of God, we are way too worried about how The World (even the part of The World that sits in the pews on Sunday) might judge us.

Ladies, there is only one Judge that has any real, permanent, everlasting authority to judge us and He has found us completely worthy, valuable, able, important, loved, adorable and amazing. But then all our more troubling failings have been washed in the Blood of His Son. He longs for us to see ourselves as He sees us, value ourselves as He values us. In fact, God values us so much that He is passionate about wanting us to take very good care of ourselves, avoiding the sin which damages us, the fear that confines us, the habits, hangups and hurts that we hang on to even when they are causing us pain. God wants us to avoid the choices we make and the actions we take that leads us on paths more treacherous and menacing because of our own willfulness.

You are a 10. Every day. All day and night. You know your every slip and limitation and error, but God's only response to that is, "Let me help you heal that pain and injury going forward and learn ways to fulfill your purpose."

If the perfect and almighty God sees that you are infinitely valuable and utterly beloved, what does anyone else's opinion matter?

For 6,000 years before the birth of Christ salt was a staple of life. It was necessary in food preservation such as dried foods and pickled foods. Over the years more than 10,000 uses have been identified based on the web site http://www.saltworks.us/.

So I like it when I read in Matthew 5:13 that Jesus says to us, "You are the salt of the earth." and in the next verse He calls us "the light on the hill that cannot be hidden." It says my life has purpose and value.

Even when I don't FEEL very important or valuable I can trust in these words and look around for opportunities to bring flavor and light into the lives of those I love and those I meet.

The world has different values than God. The world values wealth and power and strength. God values our resources, authority and persistence when pledged to His service; when we stop trying to do it all ourselves and begin to understand that God may have a different, indeed a better plan than we can come up with on our own or execute efficiently. Surrendering our abilities, gifts and will to God is not easy, but the Spirit of God hears our prayers for guidance and discernment and wisdom.

Giving up to God is not giving up on hope; it is giving up on trying to do it based only our our own knowledge, understanding and perspective and trusting that God has knowledge, understanding and perspective that is perfect and that God has pledged through the death of His Son, to teach us how to live for Him to our own highest good. 

Growing up in Kansas City we had the blessing of knowing more about the Negro Baseball League that many folks our age. And no one's name was more well known that Leroy Robert "Satchel" Paige. One of his most beloved bits of wisdom is this: "Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you."

For folks, trying to rebuild after falling into criminal behavior, incarceration, addiction and simply "self-will run riot" living, have much detritus and baggage that trails in their wake. Even though they have made changes in their perspective and values, the back child support and broken relationships must be addressed, sometimes over years. Bad credit and unpaid taxes do not magically disappear because someone is truly sorry and longs for life to be different. 

And, though none of us likes to think about this so much, truly working to make amends, working to rebuild areas where our skills need honing and building, being the consistent person in our child's life day-after-day is really better for everyone because of the need to work and attend and commit. Frankly it has been "all about me" for too long and I need to remember that my behaviors and choices have caused pain, loss and fear that has accumulated over time. ALL deserve (I deserve and those who have traveled with me deserve) recovery, renewal, restoration and the chance to build faith in God and in each other. That is a life journey, not an event.

So I don't think pretending that past did not exist, or more damaging, trying to rewrite it to pretend it did not happen is at all helpful. But neither does it help to believe that what has gone before in our life defines my future or demands that we surrender to the nonsense that we are somehow destined to continue making bad choices and putting our convenience ahead of the well-being of those we love (or want to love).

What I do believe is that through the grace of God, we can say with St. Paul, "I forget (don't obsess) about the things behind me and reach out for the things ahead of me. The goal I pursue is the prize of God’s upward call in Christ Jesus.”*

God did not send His only beloved Son Jesus to die so that we could be punished and bound by what we have done and what has been done to us in this sinful world. God sent His Son so that the world (and that is you AND me, buddie) can be saved. God loves you and is so big, so powerful that He can even take the worst you have ever done and make it count for something bigger and greater by His Power. Don't think you don't count or that your burden of sin is too big for God.  That is rather silly, if you think about it. God can do anything and has promised His good for you. God is never bound by our brokenness!

Have a talk with God about this today. He has been waiting to hear about the longings of your heart --from you -- for such a long time.

* Philippians 3:13-14 (CEB)

Come as you are. This phrase is running through my head. Come-as-you-are parties were all the rage when I was in junior high or high school. Someone would get in a car and drive around to their friends or family and announce a surprise party where you were expected to come in your gardening clothes or pajamas or with shampoo in your hair. Kind of like selfies posted to the web but you have to show up in person.

It is so tempting to put on a particular face for a given situation. I think we women get encouraged to do that from an early age.  "Don't wear your troubles on your face." "Put a smile on you face." "Turn that frown around and it will be a smile." Of course, the guys are told to wear their game faces or poker faces so I guess it is really a common human problem.

So how do I stay centered and calm while also being authentic and appropriately transparent as I go through my day? And how do I do that without being a yo-yo bouncing from one face to another depending on my situation and emotions?

I think this is the part I have to remember: I am not in charge. I have authority over the choice I make and the values I embrace and when I can that with prayer and discernment I spare myself a LOT of sorrow. But beyond doing the best I can, I have to remember I have no control of the response others make to my choices or how those choice play out. But this does not mean I am at the mercy of an ever changing sea, in danger of drowning in uncertainty and fear. Rather, it means I have a loving, powerful and attentive God who has the helm of the ship of my life if I will just stop embracing fear over love. And I can do that right now!

So I invite you to give it a try. Come as you are to get to know the God who already knows and loves you. He knows the true you and is so much in love with you, His beloved child!

I've been thinking about this recently. What propels us to do good for others?

It cannot be wholly about our relationship with God since folks who self identify as atheists or agnostics as well as socially religious folks volunteer for any number of altruistic endeavors from animal shelters to coaching inner-city baseball teams to soup kitchens.

It appears that there are two distinct reasons people volunteers: (1) To feel good about themselves; or (2) because they believe they have a responsibility to do so. Both can propel folks into doing good works and both have potential problems attached.

If I am only helping you to make me feel good it puts a LOT of pressure on you to 
     (a) be appreciative (If you have ever been expected to be grateful you know this can be a very crumby position              to be in.
     (b) be acquiescent (If you have ever been told what to like because someone expects you to like what they want 
           you give you, you know this is no fun either.)
     (c) be less able to care for oneself (If you have ever needed help and been left feeling judged or inferior 
           because of it, you know how demoralizing this is.)

Neither is it much fun to be the recipient of begrudging help. It is kind of like the difference between have a pleasant time with everyone helping to clean up after dinner versus having one person who is sulky, negative and generally ill tempered banging every pot and pan.

Another challenge is to keep up the energy needed to continue helping if the recipients of our help are too broken themselves to both bear their burdens and boost our egos. And begrudging as we go along trying to keep a happy smile pasted on while we are helping against our true desires does not endure, especially if circumstances change and the giving becomes more burdensome.

That is why things are different for me since I started doing things out of gratitude for all I have been given, all I have been forgiven, all the joy in my heart because God loves me. I'm not saying it is easy to be merciful to folks who are challenging or angry or very, very, very much in need. But when I see God's face in their's it is much, much, much easier. God may, and often does, ask me to help where no return is possible either in gratitude or humility, and neither will I get much "credit" in the world. And I will still feel burnt out and put upon sometimes, but God can get me powered back up and perspective adjusted with increasing speed.

So, if you are feeling burnt out, under appreciated, and dragging yourself along, have a chat with God about it. He may have a better approach, a drink of refreshing water, a healing for the pain your soul bears because of the sadness you have seen others bear. God can help you get out of your own way so you can truly give love to the brokenhearted without loosing yourself. 

I think of the good qualities that we seem to be loosing like mercy (Cut them a little slack for mercy's sake!), or ethics (Stealing is stealing and the size or value of the item does not change that!)

But I think persistence may be one of the most urgent skill sets needed today. From Instagram to YouTube we want it now! We think we deserve everything we want, and we deserve it NOW. It seems like everyone is throwing a temper tantrum! It is exhausting.

I have long believed that every truly good thing in my life requires work. Some classes may be easier than others, but learning does not happen with the crew of the Starship Enterprise finding the robot hat that allows a clerk to do brain surgery. It happens because we are willing to (1) acknowledge that there might be something worthwhile that we don't know; (2) listen, read and watch/do to begin developing a base of knowledge/skills. (3) Continue doing, learning, practicing so we can continue to grow in proficiency. 

All of life is about learning, from financial basics of how to take care of ourselves, to job skills, to how to play nicely with others, to growing in our relationship with God. Always one day builds on the one before. We can become wiser by considering the actions and choices and assumptions that got us into trouble and, thereby, become more proficient at avoiding at least that particular mistake. We can try new things, and practice, practice, practice and gain skills and knowledge.

But it does not happen instantly, just because we want it or demand it or think we deserve it -- instantly.

Life is hard work, but it is so worth it. When a family has been persistent about helping a family member recover from a serious injury, everybody gets to rejoice. When a marriage has been under stress and both husband and wife have worked to grow in maturity, understanding, trust and mercy so that they can be best buddies and be champions of their children, everybody wins. When the home health care nurse works with a family to care for a beloved grandparent or parent, everyone is blessed. And sometimes I think the blessing is in direct relationship with the amount that a person has freely given to the process.

In our personal journey some folks have to work harder to learn to read or play the piano or improve their batting average, but each time they accomplish a new level of proficiency they are encouraged to persist either by continuing to work that area or to work on a new area that is important to them even though it is challenging. This kind of success is an encouragement to try more, try harder, try something new.

Just for today, let us all be gentle in helping another persist or in persisting ourselves even though we feel we have tried hard enough, given enough, done enough. Just for today I ask God: help me go another inch, another 5 minutes, one more moment of patience and persistence doing that tough stuff for those I love and for my own good. AMEN.

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. Gal. 6:9 

Today I need hope. There are just days like that when the temptation to rely on my own strength and ideas overrides my best judgement and I learn yet again that I am not God.

But no matter whether it is fear or frustration or jealousy or any other of the common human stumbling block, there is only one answer. God.

Fortunately, God is utterly faithful even when I am not. God is love, even when I am struggling to love. God is all powerful when I am painfully aware of the limits of my own capacity to make things go my way and less grateful for that than I am on saner days.

So today I am so grateful that God sent this verse to remind me of God's limitless love and patience with me and I send this reminder to you today in case something is disturbing your peace: 

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

O Spirit of God, thank you at all times and in all places and through all circumstances. AMEN

I want to much to control my life, control the lives of those I love and when I see my children or grandchildren or friends struggling I want to go on the war path and make things OK. But here is what I have learned over the years.

1. Much as I may not like what is going on in my life or that of my children and grandchildren or friends, I really do not know what needs to be done to make things better. I have tried ranting, pleading, manipulating, demanding, whining, plotting, forcing, and coercing. I have often managed to make thing worse by these behaviors but I have never made anything better.

2. I have no control if I relay only on my own resources. I do eventually run down from exhaustion and an orgy of frustration, and when I stop and acknowledge that I have not been left in charge (and would be inadequate to the task if I were) then I can begin to hear God singing love, hope, wisdom, power and restoration into my life.

3. The more I am able to surrender my own ideas of what needs to happen and be still and patient, the more I find I am used by God to offer comfort, hope, faith that their lives matter, and that, no matter where they are or what mistakes they have made, God loves them and welcomes them. 

4. When I let God have authority over my life He finds plenty of worthwhile things for me to do. In fact, I wish I were triplets so I could do more of the delightful, blessed, powerful things that I see where my gifts can make a difference. I don't expect to ever be out of things to do as long as I live, because each person I meet represents an opportunity to fellowship or minister or rejoice.

5. As I look back over my life I realize that many experiences, trials I have had, sorrows I have born, mistakes I have made have been made valuable as I seek to be the hands and feet of God. Lessons hone my natural abilities or teach me things I lack altogether. Challenges overcome teach me tenderness and compassion for folks I had previously had little patience with. Sorrows brake my heart of stone and give me a heart God can work with so I know more deeply how utter reliable is my God.

Author Corrie Ten Boom is quoted: "This is what the past is for! Every experience God gives us, every person he puts in our lives is the perfect preparation for the future that only he can see." 

So, whatever is going wrong in your life, ask God to show you how you can make it count for something important. It is a prayer God has always answered "yes" to me.

Who can hide in secret places so that I cannot see them?” declares the Lord.* 

Some days this is such a comfort because I know that I am never outside God's authority, God's capacity to protect, tend, guide, love. 

But, seriously, sometimes it is pretty unsettling. On those days when I'm fuming and fussing and judging and turning my back on someone who is struggling because I just don't feel I have the energy, I would rather not have to consider that God sees that too. Because in my deepest heart I know that I have it so much better than would have been left to the paths I chose on my own. I have made mistakes that I could mostly mend with quick repentance and honestly making amends where I can and have made big, colossal mistakes that only God can and does heal. I have some challenges, but the blessings are so much more when I think seriously about all I have been forgiven, all I have been given, how slow I am to step up without whining. Then to know that God is fully aware of how I fail to be merciful, honest, kind and fail to chose love over fear, this makes me be more honest with myself.

Almighty God, help me to snuggle into Your Love and care, seek Your Truth, walk in Your Will, speak with gentleness, live the life You have rehabilitated for me, rebuilt for me, restored for me, the life You created me to live; trusting You, serving You, being Your hands and feet to a sorrowing and troubled world. AMEN

* Jeremiah 23:24 (NIV)

Today I was reading about Jesus being in a crowd and people were trying to touch his clothes. As a Jewish people there is a tradition of respect for the garment we now refer to as a prayer shawl, part of the every day attire of Jewish men that is worn to declare their respect for God and God's call to live according to God's laws. People in the crowd around Jesus believed that if they touched this prayer shawl that they might be healed. Jesus respected their needs and their efforts to claim a relationship with Him by healing all who seeking healing in this way.

That is how I feel sometimes, that I want to reach out and touch something tangible to proclaim my desire to be closer to God; I want to connect with God on my human level. While Jesus is not walking around on this earth right now; He sends the Spirit of God to teach us how to have a relationship with God and to bring us healing of spirit, of mind, of body and of community.

How amazing is that!

Lord, Savior, Redeemer, pour out the Spirit of the Most High God upon me that I might be healed by You, be made whole, able, useful, powerful according to Your Will for my life. AMEN.

All in the crowd were trying to touch him, for power came out from him and healed all of them.  Luke 6:19 (NRSV)

I long to bear to sorrows of those I love, but I know that I would be stealing something important from them if I did. Looking back on my own life, I confess I have learned much more from the challenges and griefs then I have from beautiful sunrises or exquisite art or delightful music.

I wish I were the sort of person who embraces that beautiful sunrise with a passion to embrace God more intentionally but, frankly, I'm much better at doing that when I'm terrified that I am , or someone I love is, hanging over the cliff of bad choices or the crushing consequences or what seemed at the time like small errors. And under that cliff are all the people who love the person hanging there, some aware of the danger and others thinking the shade is refreshing. But either way, they are about to be on the receiving end of the fall out from someone else's back choices.

Since about anyone can make such an error at any time (some far more spectacularly than others) it is tempting to simply not care about anyone all that much. But that is insuring an empty existence. So we consider only loving the "worthy" and then when the inevitable error comes from them the damage is compounded by unrealistic expectations of perfection in another. Or the truly big deal, when we fall on our own noses, fail to come up to our own expectations and cause harm to those we most long to protect, which then causes us to believe we are unworthy.

Nope, the only real answer is to remember this precious verse from Psalm 24:18: The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Because life has bumps and pings and it also has gouges and smash-ups but God is prepared, even when we are not. God gives us people with ideas and book with lessons and small bumps all of which help us be ready when the smash-ups come, whether they are blow-back from someone we love or if we have messed-up our own selves.  

God is big enough for any mess, challenge, change, disasters, horrors, dust-ups or blow-ups. God has you in the palm of His hand like a tiny chick to be tended and caressed and loved. Once God has helped you back on your feet you will be called to take all you have learned and experienced and put it to work helping others who are fragile, frightened or in pain. Their pain may be of a different ilk, but pain is pain and once we know how God manages that for us, it is a joy to be part of the work of helping others find they have access to that same healing and hope.

Are you brokenhearted today and crushed in spirit? God longs to tend and and caress and love you in healing ways. Start a conversation with God today and the Spirit of God will embrace you as you begin a journey of a lifetime. 

I have some pretty strong feelings about shame. There are phrases that reverberate from my childhood. One of the most irritating was "Shame on you; you're a bad girl." Now I do not know by what mercy I found this so amazingly irritating that I decided at a VERY young age that my entire family was nuts and impossible to please. At the same time I believed it was OK to love them anyway. Over the years I found much of what they believed was solid, even if their ability to live it out often lacked mercy and grace. 

I must also confess that although the ONE thing I was most determined to do was not have those words a part of my children's lives, but especially my first born heard them slip out to my horror and it was probably by number 3 or 4 that I finally was free. (This had the benefit of teaching me that what is important to us can be accomplished with persistence if not perfection.)

And this brings me to my point for today. There are bad things that happen to us. Sometimes we have even placed ourselves in harm's way by making poor choices that make us more vulnerable and behaviors that broadcast our fears and fragility. NOT ANY of that EVER is to our shame. The shame always belongs to the person DOING THE BAD THING!. So, if you were treated badly, please shed any shame related to this. Inappropriate shame is not yours to bear or even forgive. (Really, being told I am forgiven for something that was done TO me is about the creepiest thing I know.)

There are bad things we do: we do them to ourselves and we do them to others. The feeling of shame is part of what calls us to be accountable to others, to ourselves and to God. We are responsible to repudiate the bad that we are tempted to do, the bad we have done. We are responsible to make amends as we are able, without causing harm to another.  And then we are responsible to give this righteous shame to God FOR ALL TIME, because God is in the business of shame removal. Some would have us believe that if we release our shame we are inadequately sorry for our errors, mistakes, sins...

But in truth, God is either Truth, and in the love and rehabilitation business for everyone OR God is just a sham and no one escapes because not one is perfect. If this is a challenge for you, either because you are weighed down by the weight of someone else's guilty behavior, or the weight of your own already forgiven guilt, you are really smacking God right in the kisser!

If your beloved child came to you and said, "I'm so sorry I (insert crumby/dangerous/rude behavior here)" would you not be more concerned with the damage and danger for your child than anything else? So it is that God gives us rules (commandments) because God knows how damaging our errors are FOR US. We can not harm God, but we regularly throw ourselves down the rocky cliffs of self-critical, self-pitying, self-destructive ways of thinking...and then try to blame God who has been standing beside us shouting, "Stop! Don't! Change course! Let Me Help!" for eternity.

So, if you have done something shameful, confess your sin to God and ask Him to heal, instruct, renew and lead you just as Jesus promised and the Spirit of God empowers. That is the godly sorrow that bring repentance and leads people to salvation and releases us from crushing regret.

But worldly sorrow, that either we drag around because we don't fully trust God's promises to restore us, or the sorrow the world demands we parade to be acceptable to them, needs to be shed, repudiated, discarded, buried, ignored and, if it shows up again tomorrow, then get shed of it again and keep on like that until you finally have developed the habit of gratitude for God's love and acceptance -- because inappropriate shame is a cancer that kills us if we don't give it to God and keep giving it until we grow tired of dragging it back into our lives.

Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. 2 Corinthians 7:10

When my son was arrested my first thought was, "At least I know where he is and if he dies someone will tell me." This is how I felt after watching a delightful, bright, kind child slide down the slope of rebelliousness, and alcohol abuse, moving closer to angry, aimless friends and away from functioning, growing friends. It was a summer of gang wars and high homicide rates in the city where he lived. His expectant girlfriend had fled the city, although she was supportive of his efforts to escape a life of endless unhappy 'today's. It ushered in days where tiny points of light poked through my fears for my beloved child....like the day he called to say he had met meth cookers in prison and, "Mom, I could have died!" Or the day he said, "I had forgotten how much easier life is sober so I don't have to spend hours and hours cleaning up some mess I barely remember making."

As a beloved child, parent, sibling, spouse, or friend begins skirting criminal behaviors, slips over the fine line into addiction, begins interacting with legal systems, maybe first as a victim because of the places they frequent or the company they keep, and then because they begin justifying behaviors that are blatantly illegal, we council, badger, lecture, pray, plead with both the loved one and with God. We think with the first arrest that surely that will wake them up; then the first conviction; then the first incarceration, then the loss of loved ones and friends who drift away from the challenges of keeping in touch with some who is incarcerated.

For some that awakening comes, but if it does not come with a new or renewed relationship with God, the baggage of past mistakes can make a permanent change in direction wicked hard.  I heartily thank God for every welcoming church, every mentor, every letter writer that offers wise counsel, for every program inside and outside that offers classes in parenting, money management, job skills, sometimes such basic job skills as understanding the need to be on time, not steal from an employer and to be tolerant and kind to customers, and for employers who believe in debts paid. But most of all I offer thanks that God meets us where we are, loves us, teaches us, heals us so that we can free ourselves from all within us that interferes with us living and loving as we were created to live and love.

For those of us on the outside, we do not have to wait for our child's release to be freed from fear, hopelessness and guilt. And the incarcerated do not have to wait until their release to live lives free of the shame and anger that has circumscribed their lives since long before the day the jail door swung shut.

Let us claim today all that God has to offer that we might be free to serve each other through love.

You were called to freedom, brothers and sisters; only don’t let this freedom be an opportunity to indulge your selfish impulses, but serve each other through love. - Galatians 5:13 (CEB)

I had the delightful experience of living along the Florida Gulf Coast's northern most shore where this time of year the beaches are white and the water is green and oh so clear. The sea oats dance in the breezes and slowly they grow heavy with the seeds that will spread the plants, shooting down deep roots to anchor the sugar sand during storms. I carry in my heart that image of the sea oats bending and heavy with ripening seeds and the surf moving in and out. 

Having grown up in the Midwest, the image of stalks of wheat heavy with grain is also familiar and dear to me. I have been thinking about fields ripe for harvest a lot as I am gathering information on local jail and prison ministries. My personal view is this: jails and prisons are crumby places at the best of times, some are soul searing and all are boring. If we can not offer God's love where there is so little hope, so much shame and no small amount of guilt, then when can we?

When we offer programming for the incarcerated many come from boredom. Too few feel that looking into the face of God would be a good thing, or no one is excited about the idea that God knows their true self. So we leverage boredom and an interest in cookies into an opportunity to speak hope, healing, redemption, restoration, renewal and a productive future to folks who often have desperately little hope that they might be able to find a better way.

Please pray for those ministering to the incarcerated, working with the newly released, teaching life skills and new ways of thinking, mentoring and generally following Jesus' directive in Matthew 9:36-38: When he saw the crowds, he (JESUS) had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.” 

Won't you be like Jesus and have compassion on the lost? write a letter of encouragement? grade Bible study papers? bake cookies? be a mentor? be a team member to visit inside? be a team member to console and tend the family members? serve on a board? write a check? remember to pray regularly?

Indeed the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.

One of the most challenging parts of loving someone who is making bad choices is watching the "inevitable" coming. Sometimes we understand the dangers because we ourselves have been willful and foolish. Sometimes it is because we grew up in dangerous or chaotic households that we have mightily endeavored to not replicate in our adult relationships. Sometimes common sense dictates this unequivocal reality: when we keep doing what we are doing, we keep getting what we got, often with increasing ferocity. 

So watching a loved one keep lying to themselves about how all their sorrows are the fault of others, about how a little (insert addition here) won't hurt that much and if it does it will be only hurt the person indulging in the addition, about how no one else can ever understand their bad luck, is stunningly painful.

So this verse from 2 Corinthians 1, verse 7 speaks to me: Our hope for you is unshaken; for we know that as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our consolation. 

No human person can truly know the heart or pain of another, but God does. No human person can heal for another, or even, I believe, for themselves, but God offers healing right here, right now for each and all of us. I believe that God makes us new by the Spirit of God as we grow in faith--be it baby steps or leaps and bounds.

Those we love who are incarcerated and/or trapped in criminal thinking have a journey to restoration, renewal and hope. We who love them also have a journey to restoration, renewal and hope. They are not to be confused to be the same journey, but they are intertwined. This dance of sorrow and hope ties our hearts together so when one steps forward or slips back it affects the other. While we cannot (and should work hard to not attempt to) control or define the journey of another, we can inspire hope with every step forward WE take. 

We both suffer, but also we are each and both consoled, healed, tended, taught, and loved by God. Claim God's consolation in your own life, that your light of hope and healing might shine into the lives of those we love.