Life is just complicated and seems to get more so with every new advance. Doctors have never been very efficient about considering the role of nutrition and life-style in health and now the number of pharmaceuticals and prosthesis and surgical options make keeping "on top of things" even more complicated. Firemen face fires where new chemicals may be stored or a meth lab be tucked into a back room and that makes fighting fires frustrating and dangerous in new ways. We would like to help our children with their homework, but the latest educational fad makes that challenging.

So I think it is only sensible to believe that when things are challenging between family members or friends or neighbors or even strangers, we have all probably contributed something to the problem. When we get stuck in a victim mode we get all blustery and angry because we are afraid. We don't understand how it all happened. We are afraid we will be hurt again. We are not wholly sure if we are unreasonable or if the other "side" is, but it sure feels like somebody is.

And sometimes it is pretty clear that there is a primary problem that we can mostly agree is at the center of the storm.

But as things calm down, it is worthwhile to revisit the sequence of activities that led to the damage and search for lessons, acknowledging where we personally might have added to the chaos or missed a chance to put out the fire. Things we say when scared and upset can make things worse. Observing warning signs and walking away or speaking softly to diffuse tension is a skill we develop as we mature. Reserving the need to "protect and defend" to the response of last resort has saved many lives. Learning it is impossible to have a conversation with someone who is drunk is truly a life saver. Two drunks yelling is always a bad idea.

But even in smaller situations where only feelings are hurt and relationships damaged, we still can usually find something we might have done differently if we had understood the situation better. Was the person who spoke the pain actually ill or in great emotional pain themselves? Did we let someone else stir the pot for their own purposes? Did we let our own fears and pain color our response in ways we later regret?

It is important to consider these matters, not only for our own well-being, but because this can be the perfect opening in moving toward some healing. "Bob, I'm sorry for some of the things I said. We may disagree on this, but I still love you and want you to be a part of my life...family...team...troop."

So, if you miss a relationship, a family member at the table, a church friend, laughing with a neighbor, maybe...just maybe, you can use what you learned in revisiting the pain to gently nudge the door open a bit.

We may often hear that we forgive for ourselves because it releases us from the  person who harmed us. I understand that. I truly do not want to give angry, passive-aggressive, narcissistic people any of my resources in time, thought, money, etc.; nor do I want to fertilize feelings of self-doubt, selfishness, anger, disrespect and frustration by replaying the same tapes in my head. It is painful and unproductive.

So finding a healthy distance from harmful places and thoughts is, in my view, a worthwhile and life-conserving process. It allows us to develop space to learn what we can from the horrible experience. What did I miss that left me vulnerable to this wrong? If I keep having problems, is my man-picker or my friend-picker broken, or am I otherwise in need of a new perspective? Are my expectations of the potential for perfection in myself or others realistic?

Once I have wrung any obvious healthy lessons from the experience, I am ready to ease on down the road, folding the valuable lessons into my life and letting go of all the negative detritus. Whether I am willing or even should attempt to rebuilt the relationship can be considered at this point, or at some point further down the line when the wounds have stopped oozing. 

And the issues may arise again because few of us can process a significant sorrow and sense of betrayal in a single afternoon of positive thinking. But we can intentionally choose to not replay the pain, wallow in the injustice of it all and give time and energy to something so damaging to our own peace of mind, energy and capacity to do the good that we want to do.

How can I tell I am making progress? When I'm not reluctant or halfhearted in praying for the other party, then I know God has done a good work in me. When I am freed to offer unfettered blessings for the person who caused or exacerbated my pain, then I am truly free. As long as there is a hook of resentment, self-righteousness or anger, the wound can fester and again drag me into a quagmire of unhappiness.

Being free from all that does not mean that we declare the other person without error. It means we leave the judging to God who knows all, sees all, understands what I cannot, and has all power over all. God is trustworthy in this, as in all else.

I am really angry with a deceased family member. This has the advantage that I can't track her down and yell things I then later regret. I could trek out to the cemetery and yell at the head stone, but I've not found such conversations really helpful.

Actually, since I have been doing some family history research, I have found several relatives I would like to have a serious talk with about why they left so much painful luggage laying about from their time on Earth. And I have some relatives that carried far heavier burdens than I could begin to understand, but now better understand their general crankiness.

In the end, we all make mistakes and, where we do not work to forgive and seek forgiveness, we leave a trail of problems for our children they often do not even understand. But they live with the ashes. We wonder why a grandparent had no interest in us because we do not understand the conflict that occurred before our birth. We wonder why a parent could never manage to say the words, "I love you" until we understand something of their own life's journey.

What do I need to attend in my own life, so my children learn to be courageous forgivers, and even more courageous forgiveness seekers? How can I show in my actions that I really believe the things Jesus taught about His expectation that we should forgive all others as He forgives us. And how can I forgive myself, making me more forgiving?

Maybe I need to write a letter to my irritating deceased relative and light a fire to it or bury it or read it out loud at the graveside so I don't track this mud into the lives of my children and grandchildren any longer. Mostly, I need to talk about this with God so I can open my heart to the healing that only God can give.

I find lots of folks feel they would be approving of a behavior if it was forgiven. But I can't figure out where that idea came from.

After all, God does not approve of my sins, but God does forgive my sins. Otherwise all of my efforts to follow the teachings of Jesus are wasted. And I have seen too many redeemed lives to believe that to be true.

I'll share my perspective, although I know it is not popular. Most of the time I am really not the target of someone's bad behaviors, I'm just in the wrong place at the wrong time. You flip me off as you weave in and out of traffic like Mario? You don't know me, so I'm pretty sure it is about your attitude, your failure to start on time, your family drama, your illness, your....you get the idea. It is not personal. That does not mean that it is less frightening or less dangerous or less illegal; it is just not about me.

And when someone is legitimately furious with me personally, I'm happy to do what I can to help us find peace, but understand this: Your rage does not constitute a reason for me to change my values or ethics or priorities just because you want me to do something different. And I'll try not to be just as furious back at ya' while we work on this.

For me, forgiveness is a lot about just not wanting to expend the energy to be mad. Most of the time the entire drama has no possible good outcome, especially if the conflict STARTS with yelling. Let's at least try to consider the situation with calm and courtesy, forgoing the temptation to assume the other person is evil, stupid, mean or whatever they would have to be to intentionally cause harm on purpose. Let's look for common ground, folks!

And when I offer forgiveness or express a willingness to find a better way of doing things I am saying this: sometime down the line I might need the favor back, because we all say things thoughtlessly, act unkindly, fail to use common sense, common decency and common courtesy, and generally stand in need of forgiveness and mercy ourselves.

And thinking how I long to be treated when I mess up helps me keep a bit more perspective.

We wound each other so deeply sometimes...broken families, broken friendships, broken church families, hostile work environments and school bullies. I've experienced all that and I found a sad kind of comfort in holding on to my anger and demands for reparations and reminding myself often and with excruciating detail how awful it all is. Until finally the exhaustion catches up and, finally I'm ready to ask God to help me.

Then I have to start considering how to go forward. Is there some way to stay safe from future hurts? Although we all want to burrow into a dark, warm place to lick our wounds and build protective walls, I found that to be a very painful response that requires me to backtrack over a lot of rocky terrain trying to find my way back to ground zero before I can even begin to move on. In our rush to be "safe" we do an incredible amount of damage to ourselves.

Then I have to consider what I want to happen: Treat it like a death where I can reach a point where I can enjoy some good memories without risking new pain? Pretend it never happened, possibly confusing the person I am unhappy with because they don't realize I have cause to be mistrusting? Become a social gypsy where I keep friendships and family relationships light and bolt at the first sign of challenge? Rebuild the relationship on a new, sounder foundation?

How might I go about approaching a reconciliation? Can I identify how I might have handled things differently even in some small way? Can I calmly express my feelings about this? (A trusted mentor or counselor can help.) Can I imagine things that might have contributed to the problem? Should this be offered via a hand-written note, or a phone call or over lunch? 

I would mention this: sometimes I have been hurt and the other party was sufficiently clueless, self-focused, overwhelmed with their own baggage or just not that into me to make any kind of reconciliation either unrealistic or unsafe. But I have benefited from going thru the process up-to, but stopping before, making any contact. Also, to the extent you can avoid "conversations I want to have" twirling through you head, do so: the other person does not have the script and so it really can confuse the issues.

Oh, God of second chances, You have forgiven me when I have offended against Your Laws, treated Your other children with disdain or even hostility, and treated myself badly. Help me to grow the spirit of forgiveness into my life using the mirror of Your love and forgiveness for me as a map and ruler, and with the help of Your Holy Spirit. AMEN

I've been thinking a lot about forgiveness.  I have a personal challenge in this area I've been working on, and I'll be working on it for a while I suspect.

I guess this is one of the things that is on my mind. My grandchild accidentally breaks a dish and their little face is stricken with such distress. It is so easy to forgive that mistake; there isn't really anything to forgive because that child is far more precious than any item I own and their judgement is not fully formed and well.....it just is so easy to give them a big hug and assure them that they are as loved and accepted as ever. After everyone is calmed down we may have a teaching opportunity, but the forgiving part is just so easy.

But when bigger problems arise I expect imperfect, broken, damaged, human folks to get it right and not cause me any grief, even though I know I am causing harm even now in ways I don't understand...a harsh word here and an emotional withdrawal there. I can argue in my head (and that is usually a sign I'm being stubborn about something) that the flub was "intentional" even though I think that is often not true, or that "they should have known that would upset me" even though I know I can't always anticipate the pain an act or words of mine evoke, or that "it is just not fair", but then what is?

So this is my prayer today:

Lord, release my pain, my fear, my habit of being angry about life's bumps and boo-boos. Help me to be far more concerned with the needs of others than the times when folks have disappointed me. Some things are truly a big deal and require more work and longer timelines, but today help me sweep away the little annoyances that cause pain for me and for those I love far in excess of the actual errors involved. AMEN

We laugh at "Two and Half Men" on TV, but are appalled when the reality of consequences splashes across our TV screens. We say women deserve Chippendale male strippers to be "equal" with men and wonder that more and more people of both genders are getting hooked on porn because we have been told "all sex is natural." We have demanded adult themes in TV shows be shown at earlier and earlier times, and now with cable, are aired 24-7; now we wonder why our children are sexualized at younger and younger ages. (You can tell me you monitor your TV and computer usages in your children, but you can not possibly know if every home they visit, every friend with a wireless device are as attentive and careful as you are yourself.)

So do we become helicopter parents? Become the reclusive family that never let's their children out of their sight? Do we infuse our children with our own fears and teach them to see horrors around every corner? My parents raised me with a community that largely supported healthy behaviors, an extended family that invested time and care in me. When my children came along a woman apologized for telling me that an older child in the neighborhood had been observed a block over teaching my 8-year-old to bike-hitchhike by grabbing onto the ice cream truck to save peddling! Man, when I was a child that news would have beat me home by many minutes if indeed the "other mom" had not actually dragged me off the bike and walked me home briskly. Today kids know most people will not step in "for fear of law suit" and too many parents are excessively defensive about their children's errors. They are kids, for Pete's sake!

So what is the answer? We do the best we can to pay attention to our children. We work to get to know neighbors and PTA families. We connect at church and volunteering. We encourage of children's friends to play at our house. We wear our knees out praying. That last is the most important, I think. Because, although we can not be everywhere, God certainly is. Although we do not have answers, God certainly does. And we must be courageous to speak gently and tenderly showing concern and love to children we observe involved in bullying or who are depressed or to offer help to bring a meal to an overwhelmed parent/s on our block or at our work.

Tired? Overwhelmed yourself? Stretched thin? In one way or another so are we all. But if we are breathing, we are able to pray and find ways to show love, even it if is just a note of encouragement or a kind word. For most of us, the options are truly vast.

In the dark this morning a group of men arose early to go to prison. They have not been sentenced by a judge. They do not get a paycheck as employees. They have no loved one they are visiting.

They are going to meet a group of prisoners who have applied to attend a KAIROS weekend within the prison walls. The prisoners are rarely more than acquaintances, if that. Some attend chapel or Bible classes, but others do not. Some just come for the food, for homemade cookies are rare treats for men serving long sentences and it is something to break the grinding monotony. 

But God has a surprise for them in the form of men who have been praying for them and already love them by the grace and power of God. The team members are such a diverse group, from professionals to clergy to retired plumbers, civilians and military, single and married, in robust health and quite frail, quite affluent to barely scraping by. But they have this in common: they have been called by God to be His Hands and Feet for this weekend and follow-up weekends as they extend the hand of Christian friendship and care to folks who live with little kindness and less trust.

They will sing and pray, learn together, eat together, laugh together and, at the best of times, share their tenderest hearts together. Lives will change, both for the guests and for those who come to serve. And it will all happen on a smaller scale a weekend or two later as the KAIROS team returns to love and support their new friends as they build or join an inside KAIROS network of fellow Christians.

They covet your prayers this weekend, these men who are called to prison to share their faith, hope and experience and these incarcerated men who have no idea what joy awaits and the staff at the prison who make extraordinary accommodation for this time. Please bear them all up today, tomorrow and Sunday, thanking God for the work He has ordained in reaching the lonely, the scared, the lost; in calling to His purpose the team; in their witness to both the prison population and the staff.

It is an amazing thing and I invite you to be a part of this by joining your prayers with theirs this weekend. Let your prayers thereby bless someone's son or husband or father or friend and their families in the free world for all eternity.

​Pray with us.

My heart is heavy because I have no memory of my United States of America wilting under fear in the way it seems to be doing now.

I am not speaking to folks who do not self-identify as followers of Christ, because what a community does that I am not a part of is not so much my business.

But to folks who call themselves Christians, proclaim they have Christian values and are part of God's Army then I do have something to say to you, my brothers and sisters:

Why do we believe that because we have experienced a period of peace and prosperity unprecedented in the history of the world that we are somehow owed a life without the dangers and hardships that are a part of life for by far and away the majority of souls on this earth?

Our parents and grandparents endured great hardship including being badly treated emigrants to give us a chance at a better life than was likely if they had not fled religious persecution, crushing poverty, hunger, danger, war and other pestilence. They endured an imploded world economy and wars that left killing fields across much of Europe and Asia. Because we were spared that part of the conflict, do we take that as proof that we are somehow owed an easier life than so many others?

Or do we understand that to much whom is given, much is expected? How did our churches loose this message? Don't ask us to serve the poor or incarcerated or refugees because they don't look like us, smell like us, eat like us, dance like us, wear their clothing or hair like us or sing like us? Is it not more important that they bleed like us, starve like us, long for a better life (or any life) for their children and safety for their aged (if they are fortunate enough to have aged family members at this point). Do they not long for God like us, miss the mark like us, hold a special place in God's heart like us?

The world refugee population topped 50,000,000 in 2014 and the pace is increasing. The UN reports that the average number of refugee children who die due to famine, treatable diseases and violence in staggering numbers solidly outpacing the number dead from terrorism.

So please, join the discussion. Pray for our world leaders. Find ways small and large to make a difference where you are planted today.

But don't expect simple answers or easy service in this world. It is both foolish and dangerous.

Creator of the world, I know You are bigger than the problems, but Your ways are not our ways and You have never promised to march us off with Your hand on the nape of our neck and force us to do better. You do stand with us, even when we are terrified, foolish and frustrated; You stand ready to comfort us, direct us, use us to help the world to see You more clearly, follow you more nearly, trust You more fully and love You and all of our each others more dearly. AMEN

We are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)

Safety is such a fanciful idea, a fleeting thing at best. Here in the USA we seem surprised when we have terrorist activity from Oklahoma City to Charleston. Most of the word deals with much more frequent and high mortality events routinely. I remember a few days before 9/11 there was a story about a gaggle of Irish girls walking to parochial school one morning who were the target of a terrorist bomb. Politicians on both sides issued statements indicating it was not that important in the scheme of their political agendas.  Somehow they had lost the capacity to be outraged by their own behaviors.

This may be why, though I was surprised, I was truly not shocked on 9/11, watching the TV and wondering how we could not see the inevitability of us also being targeted. The scale, of course, was breathtaking for us and the world, but the problem was not new.

One amazing and wonderful thing happened following the 9/11 attack: Americans who had previously found Irish terrorists somehow charming, or felt it was cool to support "the old country" in its tradition of political violence, suddenly had a new perspective on financial support for terrorists when their own children were suddenly at risk. Contributions from Irish-Americans dried up because their perspective was adjusted. (By 2009 the rate of terrorist attacks in Ireland was creeping up again. Obviously learning is both painful and requires frequent reinforcement.)

So I am holding on to hope today that from the death of innocents in Beirut and Baghdad on Thursday and Paris on Friday will come new, better perspectives. Maybe the children who are being recruited to be terrorists will seek a way out, although that is very dangerous...think Lost Boys of the Sudan. Maybe mothers around the world will decide the fear of being martyred is less important than working to save their children. Maybe fathers will find a way to move their families out areas where recruitment is most intense. (Tens of millions are trying to do so each year and the number is rising with the violence.) Maybe the folks who are running the governments and NGOs and religious folks will find ways to bring hope to those whose only hope is for 15 minutes of horrifying fame before death.

It is something worth working for, I think.

Almighty God, comfort us all. Send Your Spirit to pour out wisdom and courage and hope in these dark days. AMEN

NOTES: On Thursday in Beirut two ISIS suicide bombers killed 43 people and injured 250, and three terrorist attacks in Baghdad killed 52 and injured 85. The next day 129 died and 250 were injured (99 described as serious) in Paris in six locations. Mercifully, lack of efficiency by the terrorists who were targeting a major soccer match but arrived too late to do maximum damage kept the numbers as low as they are. In the coming days the numbers will be adjusted, but the "new normal" will change life for thousands.

http://www.newsweek.com/terrorism-rise-boko-haram-islamic-state-state-department-says-345592 from June 2015 contains the U. S. State department's horrifying analysis of the increasing terrorism in terms of both efficiency (deaths up 81%) and occurrences (up 35%) in 2014 over 2013.

Tonight senseless violence has rocked Paris again. Such an old city and over the centuries it has had many and great challenges, but today the folks involved have likely not survived such in their lifetimes.

Pray for those affected by the violence: those who are injured, the families of the dead, the medical teams and law enforcement teams that are working in challenging conditions to make things better, news teams that are working to get the story out and all whose sense of safety has changed in a moment.

Pray with confidence that no one is experiencing this without God being wholly focused on tending them, comforting them, loving them...and all of us.

I think I've made such progress in keeping the truly important in mind, in remembering that there are many ways to consider a problem and it takes all perspectives to find a truly viable solution, in staying centered in the face of other people's drama. Then something hits unexpectedly and I am back to speaking sharply, defending turf that has no value and generally missing what is really wrong, what is not being said, what the rant is meant to defend against.

Because that is what I find in my own life. My voice gets strident when I'm frightened. I defend a narrow stance because I want a narrow world where things at least appear to make sense. I know a powerful defense is a good offense.

So yet again I end up sulking or feeling as wounded as those who have been at the point of my angry words or needing to apologize and all that has to be dealt with before we can even get back to the original point of the explosion.

I'm going to keep working to stay grounded, offering mercy and trying to see past another's anger to their pain so we can skip all the drama, the posturing, the protective layering and get down to the business of loving and tending and engendering healing.

After all, that is the point of our lives I think.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

Tonight my prayer is simple. Lord, let me pay attention when you send help. AMEN

This is my prayer not only for myself but for all those I love. This is my prayer for the incarcerated and their families. This is my prayer for all of us.

We sit by someone on a bus or get in a conversation in line at the grocery store and someone speaks truth to us. It may not be a welcome or comforting truth. Or it may be so comforting that we struggle to even consider the possibility that it is true.

We read a Facebook message that says something that we feel is hardly new or noteworthy, but it causes us to itch a bit as a new take on it wanders in and out of our thoughts throughout the day.

A bit of a song or Bible verse from a long-ago Vacation Bible School or church camp gets stuck in the merry-go-round of our mind and we wonder where that came from at this particular time.

We are thinking about going back to church and someone we just met is excited about a new church they visited recently. We are worried about a health issue and while we find the test for that comes back negative, something of an urgent and important nature is found during the process and a life is saved or improved.

Not everyone who brings important information or ideas or insights will arrive in a flaming chariot. It seems it would be much simpler if they did, but they don't. We are expected to keep our eyes open and trust in God's willingness to send help.

It is so tempting to be angry when we face things that are unfair or difficult. We rant and demand and stomp off mad. We miss doing things that can make things better, such as avoiding risky behaviors or running with folks who consistently place themselves in harms way for the thrill of it or because they lack the capacity to anticipate the likely consequences of their actions and have poor impulse control. We numb ourselves with chemicals or shopping or risky behaviors.

​When we are sufficiently distressed we may demand God handle things like we expect them to be handled, when we expect them to be handled. Then we wonder why things keep getting worse. 

But the Bible tells a story about a woman whose daughter was very ill, plus they were part of a shunned people. But she was bold in her approach when asking Jesus to heal her daughter. But she was also humble, respectful, willing to trust Jesus to hear her case. And she was successful.

So I plan to remember that as I pray for the well-being of those I love, and for those I meet who are struggling and for all the folks who are working to tend the fragile and sorrowing in this world and for my own spiritual well-being.

Almighty God, Creator of all we are and see, Lord of Love, Spirit of God, you are a powerful and loving God who has revealed Yourself as Jehovah Japtha, our God who heals. This gives us confidence to approach You with the many challenges we face, the concerns we have for our loved ones and our brothers and sisters who struggle. I long to know you better, love you better, grow in grace and be more faithful in my service in Your Name and I trust You to foster that outcome. Thank you so very much. AMEN.  

The woman came and knelt before him. “Lord, help me!” she said. Matthew 15:25

Angel Tree Ministries touch a lot of lives when they support healthy contact between an incarcerated parent and a child who is missing that parent. Thousands of folks give time, energy and money be a bridge between the missing parent and the sorrowing child. The gifts are not impressive, though everyone along the way works to make them appropriate, even thoughtful. But the assurance that a child is not forgotten means more than words can express.

Additionally the participation of volunteers can speak love and healing into the families who may have found their home church judgmental or distant as they endure changes and challenges related to the choices of another. They may even give them hope that they might be welcomed into a caring and wise church home. 

Do you have a church that would be willing to deliver gifts (provided by a donor) or even adopt a family or two in their own congregation or community by providing the gifts as well as delivering them?

I truly did hear Christmas music last week when shopping with a granddaughter for snazzy birthday shoes. The retail community knows Christmas is coming. Before we get caught up in all the buying of gifts not needed, and feasts that can leave a residue of indigestion by their very lushness, and attending gatherings at a frenetic pace, now is a good time to sit down by yourself, with your spouse or with a household full of children and extended family to consider how we can bring some perspective to the holidays, how we can make our values more important that our valuables in the coming weeks.

Consider Angel Tree Ministries or one of the many other opportunities to help build a base of joy and mercy and grace as the foundation of this holiday season. 

God didn’t give us a spirit that is timid but one that is powerful, loving, and self-controlled. 2 Timothy 1:7

Oh Holy Child, Emmanuel, give us eyes to see, ears to hear and hearts to break so that we can infuse the coming weeks with a commitment to make Your Love the center of our days, our credit and debit cards and our calendars in the coming weeks. AMEN

This crisp morning there are Habitat teams across the country dressing in layers, finding gloves and giving up their Saturday to make life a little better for someone. Habitat started building homes for families excited about helping to build their first home since in 1976 and the idea has garnered a significant amount of press. But somehow as the ministry has grown the press has died down so not as many people are aware that the program also restores homes and has a program to help folks who are struggling to maintain their homes, thereby being a blessing to neighborhoods as well individuals.

Others are headed off to sponsor, volunteer and run in fundraising races, serve meals to the homeless, gather needed supplies for transitional living programs, sort food at local food banks, and pack food for shipment to folks dealing with flood, famine, civil war, earthquakes and many other disasters of nature and mankind around the world.

These folks give a bit of their time and sometimes some of their own funds to support activities that leave them tired, but also renewed. This must be true because the sea of volunteers keep coming back, often bringing family and friends to share the work and the fun and the blessings.

Some of us become passionate about a single area of ministry and others sign up whenever the opportunity presents itself. All are a blessing and part of a safety net that, though imperfect in human terms, offers various moments of mercy and grace to folks that many times we would prefer to forget exist because their burdens are great. We cannot solve their problems, but we can make a difference.

Won't you come join the fun? Won't you consider being a blessing and being blessed in this way?

Here in the Midwest the weather is always a topic of concern. We have a long agribusiness community for whom the weather is a core factor in their daily lives as well as their professional success. Because of our central location, we are buffeted by high heat and humidity in the summer, drought, pouring rains and violent thunder storms, ice storms, lots of snow and this time of year everything but the humidity might show up over a few days.

Folks who watched the first two games of the World Series and the celebratory parade a few days ago saw some of the great weather, but locals realize what a near thing it was as we are being told frost and freezing rain are possible any day...tho' next week is expected to be back in 70s, sunny and mild....maybe.

Maybe growing up here was a good experience in that the very changeability of the weather was a daily reminder that no two days are the same. The farmers need the rain and the sporting community prefers the sun, so no matter what is going on, someone is being bless. In truth, we all need both rain and sun at various times and for various reasons.

So the next time the weather does not suit me, I will choose to be thankful, either for myself or for those who are blessed by warm or cool, wet or dry, sunny or overcast. No matter what, I'll choose to be thankful.

Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:18

I have never been very good at "waiting". But life is full of things being anticipated (good) or feared (bad). And several decades of practice have increased my capacity to trust God to show me how to respond to changes both good and crumby.

You see, I've learned that I have a very small capacity to accurately anticipate the full outcome of any situation. What seems perfect and sunny inevitably develops challenges along the way. Sometimes I even find that what I have been wanting fervently really does not bring the outcomes I was looking for. And at times of challenges I have always found that God is big enough and sufficiently trustworthy to consistently bring blessings I could not fathom at the beginning of experience.

My children's great-grandfather H.C. was known for this advice: Enjoy the good times to the fullest, because they don't last. Don't sweat the bad times, because they don't last.

The thing that does last, God's love for us, is just much bigger than any of the individual events along our journey.

So for today I will choose to quit waiting and be profoundly grateful for what is!

the number of children with an incarcerated parent grows as the incarceration rate grows. When they have a parent or other family member who steps forward to offer them a stable home and unconditional love, they have a good hope of becoming productive and successful members of their community.

But for children who have no one who is able (or willing) to accept such a responsibility, children wind up in a foster care system that is a mixed bag: from truly caring (though often thinly stretched) folks with a calling to help and care, to folks who are burnt out and fail to keep the children even basically safe, much less truly loved and mentored.

This morning I have been trying to run down children whose incarcerated parent has reached out through Angel Tree Ministries to maintain contact with their children (children that, barring abuse issues, repeatedly are proven to benefit from such contact). For children drifting through a foster care system where interaction is increasingly difficult and eventually impossible it is challenging to walk the tightrope between privacy and transparency.

Won't you pray for the children of the incarcerated today? Please ask for special mercies for those who feel abandoned by parents who can not (or will not) tell them that they are amazing, wonderful, delightful, beautiful, smart, funny, beloved children, and pray that these children might learn and be frequently reminded that this is exactly how God made them and how God sees them today and always.

Today my home town is celebrating our first World Series win since 1985. I can't claim to the be wildest baseball fan, although I enjoy the team and going to games. But I am awed and delighted by the players, managers and front office of a team that presents a very impressive message to the young baseball enthusiasts in our community. They never give up. They learn from past mistakes. They are patient with young players (many have come through the team's minor league farm team system). They honor families and can win without pressuring players to pretend they have no life off the field. They are honorable and decent with no reputations for being social "players" or getting DUIs. Some will say they are "old fashioned" in this way, but I hope this is a sign of better things to come.

I hope managers and front offices around the country and in other sports are considering the atmosphere they create around and within their teams. Recently we had a regional scandal with a college recruiting professional being named as the team pimp and I can't say how sad I find that as a commentary on our culture.

So a special thanks to players who share their sorrows and joys with us. Let us honor their wives and children and the sacrifice that they make to support their champions' careers. Thanks for teammates who play their hearts out until the final out. Let us rejoice that we have a classy and talented group that we can celebrate.

The older I get the more I go gently when speaking of matters of faith: not because I am less sure (indeed I am more certain than ever of God's trustworthiness) but because there is so much I thought I understood that I have learned was, at best, partial understanding.

I believe that the Law/Ten Commandments were given to protect us, not to tempt or to give us some arbitrary rule to follow to prove our willingness to blindly follow some individual's or group's teaching. Each commandment sets forth rules, that if followed, would protect the rights and well-being of all members of society. We may not like a given rule in a given circumstance, but the fact is there that if we did not murder, steal, lie, disrespect our family members, be too busy to think seriously about values and ethics, disrespect covenants made by others and ourselves and resenting what other folks have the world would be a far more fair and peaceful place. To the ancient peoples (who lived where eating unwanted infants was practice by some peoples) authoritative rules were necessary to move toward a more civilized society. This is true today, although the interpretation of the basic rules has become more complex as life has become more complex, but there are still basic tenants behaviors that support the common good.

I believe God loves all His children and longs for them to accept the blessings of His plans for them. I believe this DOES NOT give us the right to interpret in minute detail for others. I believe it DOES impose upon us each and every one the responsibility to be vigilant in striving to grow in understanding and be passionate about fulfilling our purpose of loving and tending and learning with all of God's children (which is everybody).

I believe that as far as we wander and as belligerent as we can become, we can not outrun God's love for us. God's capacity to redeem, renew, restore, rehabilitate us is all powerful, all knowing and everywhere present. I do believe that the more we are self-will-run-riot, the more difficult it is for US to conceive of a God who forgives us when we can not forgive ourselves. That is why it is SO important for all who follow the teachings of Christ to be far more passionate about sharing the Good News of God's absolute love and forgiveness than of trying to defend details that are MUCH better when gently considered among mature Christians rather than used to beat someone over the head who does not even have a relationship with Jesus. Even with Judas Iscariot Jesus was gentle and sorrowful of his choices, but we who are imperfect feel like we can rant and rave and demand and self-justify the behavior!

Most everything else I believe I can gently lay on Jesus shoulders, that I might be enlightened and led according to the blessings of the Spirit of God, and I stand ever ready to lead to new ways of loving and serving God. 

​Abba, Father, may it be ever so.

​​Dear readers,

I am begging your pardon now, as the next couple of weeks may prove to be unusually hectic and I may miss a posting or two.

​I was recently cleared to volunteer for Prison Ministry's Angel Tree program. I'm contacting families who are caring for a child who is missing a parent in prison. Some families handle challenges with the patience, persistence and grace that comes from long practice and a strong spiritual foundation. Others are overwhelmed with the financial pressures, changes of living arrangements, sorrows and challenges of caring for children in at least some degree of sadness (if for nothing more than having parents who have to be in "time out" and the social challenges that come with that; or for a history of chaos and poor parenting, but still longing to be loved by their parents; and everywhere along the spectrum.) 

Then comes the challenges of checking with churches and community organizations who have participated in the past, but have not confirmed their involvement this year, and the recruiting of new churches to help with the still growing number of children to be served.

Please pray for these Angel Tree children, their caregivers and the parents who struggle to remind their children they are not forgotten, not the cause of their parent's mistakes, not invisible.

And if your church would like to participate, please let me know. I'd be happy to help you make the connection that can make all the difference for a child this Christmas, and give you many of the blessings of a mission trip without the travel and expense.

Oh, God of second chances, open the hearts, the wallets, the calendars, the church doors that powers ministry to children and caregivers and folks seeking a way back to lives of purpose and hope. Help us be agents of forgiveness, redemption, and renewal in ways that help us swell the ranks of the successful rehabilitated. AMEN ​