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mad for you

11/25/2015

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Is mine the only family that specializes in embracing being "mad" for someone else? It drives me crazy. I mention that a friend or family member said or did something that was irritating and five years after I'm lo-o-o-ng over the whole deal and don't even remember it all that well, somebody pops up and says, "Well, I really don't like that person because ......" and I'm like, "Really?" 

So, do you expect the person you are holding this grudge against to come apologize to YOU about something that was strictly between that person and me alone? Or am I supposed to apologize for the incident? Or exactly how do you see this being healed so that our family or extended family can be more harmonious and intra-supportive? Oh, and have you never said or did something you regretted later? And if so, why would you think it would be good to continue to hold on to this sad piece of life's debris?

And on the other hand, I have folks who expect me to be mad at someone because they are mad. The person they have issues with have not done anything to me and, frankly, I'm truly not sure what they have done since I was not a part of all that, and, so, will a text message be forthcoming declaring when I can again hold this person in common Christian care and affection?

Here is my request: Should I be distressed and confused enough to ask you to be mad at someone on my behalf, be kind enough to ignore me completely. And if you are crazy furious, I will (1) listen, (2) love you no matter what, (3) pray for you and/or with you, but I will not expend a moment's energy being mad on your behalf. We need the energy for more important, more loving things, you and I.

I'm working really hard to hold on to no rage, anger, fury, extreme frustration, ire or self-righteous indignation toward anyone for any length of time at all in my life, and I prefer not to confuse the situation with anyone else's journey, story or issues because it will not help either of us and it may well prolong an issue because of the number of side-issues that multiple participants propagate.

And if you want to be mad about that, well, you are on you own, because I have no intention of being made at you over this, or with the help of God, over anything at all ever. I love you....even if I have been known to roll my eyes on rare occasion.
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    Jann's son was incarcerated.  She longed for a community where she could connect with others dealing with similar issues.

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