Today we have our first forming meeting for the fall KAIROS Outside weekend in Kansas City. The weekend starts in 112 days (or 16 weeks) and that is only the time until the weekend starts. After the 3 day retreat in October we are committed to staying in close contact with our guests for a minimum of 26 more weeks.  For those of us who are involved in leadership positions in this ministry it is a significant commitment of prayer, time, energy, kindness, tolerance, planning, recruiting, listening and loving of our guests, but also among ourselves.

For those of you who have been affected by the incarceration of a family member of birth or choice and would welcome an opportunity to connect (at no charge to you) with other women with a special understanding and heart for the challenges you know all too well, please click on the "contact button" above and I'll mail you a brochure.

If these words leave you longing to help, we need many angels to care tenderly for our guests and if you can spare a little time you too can click on the "contact button" and I'll mail you a "Angel Application". 

We covet your prayers, for we are already praying for the women God is sending to this special time of healing. We are happy if you want to send financial support. We hope you will share with friends or family members who might be interested in being our guest.

Won't you add us to your "to do" list so that you pray with us for the coming 115 days? Costs you not a dime, yet your prayers are priceless to us and the women we serve.

Although I believe well grounded in the teachings of scripture, there is a phrase I love that is not a strict translation of Scripture: "God danced and sang on the day you were born." This is not a picture that comes to mind often. So much has been written about angry gods and pictures painted of vengeance-filled gods and much of that spills over into folks' ideas of God, Jesus and the Spirit of God.

Yesterday, when I had the breathtaking blessing of holding in my arms my hours-old newest grandchild, I was filled with joy and gratitude, both for this delightful new member of our family, and for the loving family into which he has been born. I transported his three siblings to meet him, children who had anticipated this day along with their parents for months. The look on their faces were one of those forever memories that fill our hearts.

Please join me today as I thank my God who gave me this lovely reminder of how God loves us, rejoices over us, has plans for us, delights in us. We can't be perfect in this (especially when exploring babies create unexpected upsets in sleep deprived households) but we can aspire to it, work towards it, help others who are struggling to get the support they need to embrace this. Casseroles, or visits timed to let exhausted parents catch a nap, or simply words of encouragement, or the most gently worded comments that might inspire new ways of approaching challenges, and always reminders (and ensuing actions) that the family is being prayed for and loved and rejoiced over blesses the child, the household family, the extended family, the neighborhood, the community, the church...you get the idea.

So often yesterday after I had met this sweet little guy, I felt like singing and my heart was full of gratitude to the God who makes this seem small and fleeting when compared to God's eternal and perfect love of and rejoicing over me and over you.

Almighty God, we thank you for this newest member of the youngest generation in our extended family. We ask Your Spirit pour into their home and lives Your love and joy and hope all the days of their lives; giving them always ears to hear and eyes to see. We also remember those expectant parents who instead are dealing with a new normal as things did not go as they expected and ask Your tender care for them and their extended families. And we ask special care for children born to parents who are themselves so broken that they find it difficult to rejoice over anything. We ask Your special protection for these children and healing for their parents. You are so amazing, Lord of Love and Life. AMEN

The Lord your God is with you. The mighty One will save you. The Lord will be happy with you. You will rest in his love. He will sing and be joyful about you.”  Zephaniah 3:17

Yesterday I had jury duty. I also show up to vote, even if I don't mark a box, because when there is no good choice I want to make the statement that I am not complaisant, but rather appalled. And I want to be a good citizen when it comes to jury duty too. So I showed up early and, as it played out, stayed late. I was not chosen to serve, but I chose to be cheerful about being summoned to be considered, because some day I or someone I love may need a smart, fair-minded person to show up and serve.

But I admit it was a quandary.  You see, I think the system is so utterly and unnecessarily inefficient. They want a broad range of people to participate, but they don't make that easy or fair.

I chose to ride the Metro for the first time in years because traffic downtown is so convoluted and confusing even the buses are not running on schedule, and parking is both challenging (what happens if I don't get to the parking lot before it is barred for the night? what happens if I "run over" and incur crazy additional charges? all possibilities according to court staff) and expensive. It was just easier to ride and the bus and drivers were delightful as were my fellow commuters -- unless they were totally non-interactive, which is fine too.

Let me explain why I find the system discourages good people from serving in good faith.  A lactating mother is told "there is a place to pump" but no one mentions (either there or on the website Q&As) how to get the milk to the baby or assure us that there was a refrigerator to keep the milk safe from tampering and spoilage. I sometimes think we are angry with every woman who gives birth these days and there is certainly no respect for at-home moms of toddlers. And folks who must pay for childcare are just told to suck it up. I was gone for 13 hours from leaving my house and returning to my house. Driving might have shaved 90 minutes off that while ratcheting the costs up substantially. Matching childcare with not getting out of the courthouse until after 6:00 pm does not make for calm, attentive mothers, even if they aren't also worried about their budgets.

Elderly people with obvious health problems were kept for the full ten hours and left to hobble to their cars in dangerous heat. (Folks with onerous duties caring for aging, frail family members in their homes can have great difficulty in getting someone to sub for them for extended periods).

We either had to bring our lunch or walk some distance, again in dangerously high temperatures. At least it wasn't snow and Ice! Of course if we brought our lunch we were welcome to return to the "jury room" where we could eat off our laps and drink tiny glasses of tap water..

You see, in our state jurors are paid $6.00 per day (an amount set in the 1950s), plus 17 cents per mile (as based on mid-point of residential zip code) and $5.25 for parking whether they are there for 3 hours (as some were) or ten hours as our group was. I'm not suggesting that folks should be lured to jury duty with big dollars, but I don't think it fair to ask folks with limited income and/or childcare costs to actually lose money on the deal.

Because I chose to ride a bus (and get a discount because I am over 65), thereby avoiding parking and most gasoline costs (used park & ride) and took my lunch I am on the plus side after a very long day which I am grateful does not include being chosen and therefore committed to all of this week and maybe half of next week to repeat the exercise daily. But for someone who drive the same distance I came (I live in "mid-county") the cost of parking and gas would be more like $10.00 and if they failed to plan ahead they might spend $5.00 or more extra for lunch...unless they are adding childcare costs on top of that. Really CHEAP child care is $125.00 per week and it can run 4 times that for occasional infant care, so let's call it a minimum of $25.00 per day per child.

And, frankly, unless they want to set up well supervised childcare on site, the judiciary needs to quit emotionally bludgeoning young mothers (not the fathers very often, of course) who are trying to care for very small children and/or breastfeeding and frail folks whose physicians could easily testify that their medical condition and medication may well make jury duty embarrassing and/or inefficient and even dangerous for the person.

I get it. If a person has an employer that not only means life may be ordered around 8-5 work days with attendant childcare arrangements and transportation choices (and at good companies with salaries that continue while a person is serving), but it may well be a major challenge to serve for the self-employed person, folks whose workdays and lives are structured to working evening or nights, or who balance several part-time jobs or who travel for a living or any of a number of other challenges that regular citizens face when trying to be good citizens. And it is true that some folks seemed most anxious to assure the attorneys and judge that they have such poor maturity that they are certain they would blindly give preference to one side or the other no matter the law or the evidence offered -- or maybe they just did not want to serve for the 8-9 days we were told this trial could easily run. Do I sound bitter? Well, I would not want those folks judging life and death matters for me anyway, but how selfish.

For folks who can serve: please don't let a small inconvenience for you be more important to you than a severe burden to someone else. For every person who dodges, lies or finagles to get out, someone else must step up and it may be much more of a challenge for them, or they may not be as able to process challenging cases. Failing to be an informed and voting citizens is not good. Failing this is far, far worse and more dangerous to the most fragile in our community.
 
They told me in orientation that I would be better informed about the judicial system due to my service and indeed I am. I just sorry I’m so depressed about it.

Being a Dad is no easy task, no matter what the Hallmark Cards section looks like. Dads come in all flavors and with baggage of their own. Sometimes moms are helpful to fathering and sometimes not so much. Some dads die or are sick or are absent.
 
But today I suspect a lot of fathers feel a little (or a lot) embarrassed because they wonder if they are a good enough Dad. (At least this is how Mother's Day generally strikes me, so if I'm projecting, I apologize.)

But here is the good news for all parents who struggle and wonder and even fear that they have irrevocably broken a beloved child: God is bigger than all that. Not one of us has ever had a perfect parent and no one will in this broken World. (And, frankly, I don't know that I would want to be the child that has to live up to a perfect parent anyway.)

When we slip and mess up and even see ourselves as part of a catastrophic failure, our children still have The Father, Abba Father--you know, the Almighty Father, who provides all we fail to provide. (And God provides that FOR us too!)

So we can let God be our example and tend our children (of birth and choice) as God cares for us:
 
As God loves us, be loving toward your children. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

As God forgives us, be forgiving toward your children.  The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him. Daniel 9:9
 
As God encourages us, be encouraging toward your children. “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Matthew 6:25
 
As God instructs us, be instructive toward your children.  Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4
 
Trust God to be God who loves your children better than you can yourself. And trust God to love you more than you feel you can love yourself. That’s it: trust God (and God even helps with this!) and do for those you love, as best you can, what God does for you: love, forgive, encourage and instruct.
 
This is an amazing example for your children no matter their age or yours.

If you have ever had great sorrow in your life I expect you have had someone say something that felt perfectly awful. You know, things like, "Only the good die young." or "How did this happen?" in a tone that implies I somehow should have been able to stop a drunk driver or cancer. or "You are young. You'll marry again...have another baby...be up and running on that prosthesis in no time."

Sometimes it makes us angry because we are already emotionally shredded and other time you just have to laugh at the amazing variety of foolish things people can say.

Then there are the people who are so scared of saying the wrong thing that they say nothing at all. If the sorrow is of the "illness" or "death" variety they may send a card or drop off a casserole or salad or cookies. If it is more like a still born child or at divorce or the incarceration of a loved one they may be completely freaked out and afraid of even being where the sorrowing person is.

That is why I love this verse; it is the best advice ever. Romans 12:15: "Be happy with those who are happy, and cry with those who are crying."

What a perfect idea! Let the person tell you how they are doing before saying much of anything at all. Maybe the parent who passed had been longing to see Jesus, or they may not be able to bear the thought of their passing. Maybe the divorce released someone from an abusive relationship, or maybe the oddest couple you ever met were madly in love even after decades of marriage. Maybe the person does not know what they are feeling and can barely breathe for the pain of the loss; or they may think they are broken because they aren't feeling much yet.

So here is the big secret: it is not necessary to say much at all. You don't need to try to "fix the situation" or give advice or take a side. You can just sit quietly with them, breathing gently and silently praying for the person and asking God if there are any words God wants you so say. You might say, "I don't know what you are feeling, even though I've had some sorrows myself. I realize that everyone's situation is different and unique to them. So if you need an ear I will listen, if not today at any time you call or email or text. If you can think of some small task or errand I can do for you I would be honored to do that.' Or you might just use the short version, "I love you."

It is pretty easy to be happy with those that are happy, especially if we love them and are truly happy for the event or situation that has brought joy. Although even then, when we listen carefully, we sometimes learn new things about our friend.

But this "cry with those who are crying," this is the greatest gift you can give. I remember the faces of people who showed me mercy on dark days. Some were strangers and some names I have forgotten. But the kindnesses abide with me still and my heart is forever grateful for each person who was kind when I had no expectation of kindness from them. I can only pass on this type of listening and loving when I am kindly given an opportunity. 

Abiding with, holding a hand, offering a gentle smile, looking into someone's eyes, speaking kindly all are gifts. I give them freely because God has provided mercy and grace for me.

I must admit I am frustrated when the media makes it sound like American’s are better or more important than other people. I see it when we demand that it is more important for our affluent country to have jobs than countries that struggle to put beans and rice on the table. I see politicians bragging about supporting a bill to address some irritant for middle-class suburbanites while ignoring the desperate needs of the poorest in our cities and rural communities. I see it when we barely cover the annihilation of whole communities when they are on another continent. I see it when drug usage and dealing has dramatic consequences for those living in some communities while those in other communities get ridiculous plea bargains where charges are reduced to misdemeanors.

I do not endorse the idea that some people are important and others are not important, based on where they live, the color of their skin, the amount of money they make earn, their profession, their education, the things they believe, their heritage, lineage or any other of the false measures humans use to determine a person’s worthiness to be mourned.
​
One of the most frustrating things for me is the number of people who think only Jewish people were killed in the holocaust when they were only half of the people killed. Please understand this, the other half were NOT troops, prisoners of war, bombing victims or any other folks in situations that caused even more millions of deaths during the late 1930s through the mid-1940s.The other half were gypsies, people who were married to someone identified as being in some small part Jewish, people with mental illness including depression, people accused of being homosexual, anyone who had the audacity to express concerns about the ethics of the government during these horrifying days, and anyone who irritated someone with an “in” with the murders. Each concentration camp death and each family and village who were marched into the woods and shot to death, no matter the excuse, break my heart still. It was never about who these people were. It was always about the lawlessness of a government feeding on fear, government people who whipped the fear into permission to commit horrify acts against old people and children, pregnant women and young mothers, fragile people who often could not even endure alive the journey to the camps.

Then there were the quarter of a million (mostly elderly folks, and women and children) Chinese killed by Japanese soldiers early in WW2, and the thousands of Bosnians killed by the Serbs and vice versa and the native peoples killed by various political juntas in Central and South America in the 1980s and the Killing Fields of Cambodia and the millions killed in Russia in the poms and the dead immigrants fleeing sure death in Syria and other parts of the world, so many dying just trying to get to safety,  and the Drug cartels in Mexico and the human traffickers across the world…

It is so much easier to not read history, more comfortable to pretend that things are getting better. And, indeed, some things are getting better in some ways. But in essential ways we have been and continue to be unspeakably cruel to God’s other children, all of us created by a God that longs for us to remember that each and all of us are important, not just the ones that live in our country or our state or our city or our neighborhood.

Yes, it is painful to pay attention. It is heartbreaking to pray for all families experiencing the loss of loved ones from criminal enterprise and from careless driving and from illness. But that is one of the main points of prayer: God gives us the gift of prayer that we might be able to survive allowing our attention to stay on the important things, value all people, work for justice and education and healthy living support and safe housing and adequate food for ALL PEOPLE, not just the ones on our street. And what we pray for passionately, we grow in our ability to work for passionately.

Brothers and sisters, there is no “them”; indeed, we are only us.

Roman 12:5 In the same way, though there are many of us, we are one body in Christ, and individually we belong to each other.

If I intend to follow Christ, can I be serious if I don't give serious thought to Paul's writing in Romans 8: For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. 

It is a radical belief; one that calls us to forsake all and follow God with a whole heart, withholding nothing, accepting God fully, loving radically, forgiving radically, hoping radically, accepting radically. I'm not saying we can just jump right to this point, but if God is God and if Christ's sacrifice actually does what God says it does, then don't we have to have this at least have this as a point to ponder, a light on the horizon, no matter now distant from where we are today?

Maybe today this is just too big an idea to even imagine. But I think we have to at least try to chew on the edges, because that is the very thing that can drive us to seek the Spirit of God for discernment and instruction and empowerment to think bigger thoughts, consider bigger possibilities, explore ideas so amazing that the culture of our times (in fact the cultures of all times) thinks it is outrageous and foolish.

This is why those who are serous about following the person and teachings of Christ can never sanely keep one foot in the World and the other in the Kingdom. It is just like trying to be both hot and cold or being wise and foolish or being hopeful and disparaging in the same instant. We may vacillate between extremes but we can't hold fast to both positions at the same time and withstand the strain. Love drives out fear. Fear denies Love. What we cling to will be our god.

And if God is all that Paul insists God is, then what do we have to fear? Is God All-Powerful, All-Knowing, Always Everywhere Present, Trustworthy, the Father who created us in His Own Image and calls us to claim our heritage as God's beloved and treasured child? God can help us. God promises to help us. God perseveres in standing ready to help us. God offers peace, hope, purpose and all intrinsically good things; we claim these things when we offer God our loyalty, our praise, our trust, our brokenness according to God's covenant.

​What will you cling to today?

I had my first child at age 24 and my last at age 34. I quickly figured out that God gives younger parents stamina and older parents perspective. 

In my spiritual life I have also found many things to be grateful for as I have aged. I am slower to judge; quicker to offer my time, and less scared about gently offering assistance requested.

Oh, I certainly miss the days of "all nighters" where I could run for a couple of days on a very few hours of sleep and keep on going. Now when I have to do that it takes me a week to recover any semblance of order in my life. I have always longed to be more disciplined in matters of healthy eating and exercise. Now that my body is a bit creaky here and there, it is its own best early warning system, making it easier to make wiser eating and exercise choices.
 
The things I accomplish might seem modest by the standards of a world who believes bigger and louder is always better. But I believe my improved patience (certainly not perfect) and ever deepening reliance on God have opened doors to offer comfort, hope and love in ways my younger self would have found amazing.

And I do love the diversity of folks I meet in prison related ministries. There are young people grateful to pay forward because they have known great mercy. But there are plenty of us with silver hair (maybe under a little color) and plenty of us wear glasses, some even have significant health issues and a cane shows up here and there. We believe that the opportunity to save a life is worth the effort, even though we are often not around to learn how the seeds we plant mature in the long-term. 

But that is the strength of prison ministry. We are not there to change anyone or forced anyone or manipulate anyone. We just listen and love and offer our own faith, hope and experience so that folks who feel they have no future learn the truth: God is bigger than any mess we can make and always stands ready to heal us, teach us and guide us that we might lead lives of purpose and hope. If all my efforts lead to only one person experiencing that, then my time has been well-spent.

So I'll just be taking my old carcass and grey hair out and bear a little fruit today, that a man may be the father he longs to be, or a woman may heal from deep scars, or a young person may find their future, or an aged person might be freed from decades of bondage.

On the rock of Jesus love and righteousness I will build my life, a living sacrifice to hope eternal. All are welcome.

They still bear fruit in old age; they are ever full of sap and green, to declare that the Lord is upright;
    he is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in him.  - Psalm 92:14-15 

Why does one child from a truly horrible home environment run amok and another not?
 
Why does one child from a home filled with advantage and intact parenting units thrive and another slip off the path so persistently?
 
One study of children from severely broken homes found a consistent factor for the children who stayed in school, delayed having babies, embraced apprentice or vo-tech opportunities. As Christians we might think it was "church" but it was not that exactly, although a loving church family might be the source of the "magic ingredient." The consistent common link for achieving kids was someone who believed in them and frequently told them so. It may have been a parent or grandparent, or other relative, it may have been a teacher (though current culture has made that fraught with danger for the teacher), a Bible Class teacher or Youth Director at a church, a neighbor or the parent of a friend or a mentor. But someone spoke truth to them of their status as a person of value and persisted in the relationship, asking how things were going, coaching, usually I suspect praying. Sometimes these young people had been included in family activities where they were treated with respect, first as honored guest and often eventually as family.
 
I recently met a high school student whose professional parents, at the height of productive and important careers, seem pretty unavailable to the student. He seemed like a very kind and able person, but he did remind me that any of us can experience loneliness and a sense of alienation during times of family distress and intermittent dysfunction like illness of a family member, financial collapse or social unrest.
 
Sometimes there is no understanding why a beloved child persists in bad choices, but a Seattle detective, often faced with these lost children (sometimes quite advanced in age) and the question of reclamation, found the questions claimed her heart. What she found is worth considering:  What IF?
​

If there is a word that is over used while utterly losing its deepest meaning it has to be the word "love." Dictionaries give us definitions and synonyms such as appreciation, deep affection, fondness, tenderness, warmth, intimacy, attachment; devotion, adoration, doting, idolization, worship, passion, ardor, desire, lust, yearning, infatuation, adulation, besottedness, liking, weakness, partiality, bent, leaning, proclivity, inclination, disposition; enjoyment, appreciation, soft spot, taste, delight, relish, zeal, appetite, enthusiasm, keenness, predilection, penchant, fondness and really dozens of other words that range from frivolous to creepy. And nowhere is there a word anymore that says "Love" is the name of God or even “according to Judeo-Christian teachings the feeling of God/Christ for people/followers/God creation” or anything like it.

But God IS love, shows love, gives love, shares love, pours out love, loves unconditionally, loves with infinite wisdom, loves when we cannot love ourselves and infinitely longer than we can imagine loving anything. God is love: both noun and verb -- love is what God is and what God does at all times and in all places, forever.

Maybe agape (ah-gah-pey / noun) is a better word, although this is not even on the radar for many dictionaries. Agape love is selfless, tender care that is sacrificial, unconditional, perfect in intent and capacity and eternal. No wonder folks who have never heard of what God's love is find it all confusing and overwhelming. Our human minds can (only with the help of the Spirit of God) barely comprehend such a thing. We do not experience it. Even loving, attentive parents fail to reach this level of capacity and commitment. Young love in our culture that equates "50 Shades of Gray" with love certainly does not seek it. Possibly folks in decades long loving marriages approach it. All of us who have loved and lost, loved and found we were in love with a mirage, loved and thrown it away because we could not trust it, may seek and seek trustworthy love, but no human can love in this way without mistakes or communication problems.

While we often fail to seek to understand God, God always understands us, even more than we understand ourselves. God loves us utterly from forever, for forever. God does all the heavy lifting in this relationship, but God is delighted as we seek God with trust and joy and passion.

And because we are filled and fulfilled and renewed and healed and empowered and awash in this amazing love, God expects us to let it spill through us to others who are seeking, and to those who no longer even feel it is worthwhile to seek such acceptance and trustworthiness and abundance.

This is why, when we are new in faith we are right to tread softly, seeking out people who are living out their faith, using their hands and feet and sweet words comforting and mentoring and loving in a way that reflects God's love. Seek people who humbly seek to practice agape love as they have received it, without taking credit for the good they do.

As Christians new and renewed and long-time in the faith, we want to emulate these folks, and become these folks, by living in and giving away bushels of loving kindness and unconditional respect to each of God's children...and that is you and me, baby, and each and all of us!

2 Peter 1:7

We all bring a unique set of gifts and challenges along with us into our faith families. Being friendly is easier for some than others. But this is an important part of growing in life and in faith.

I am full of sorrow when I meet someone who says they have tried to attend a church, but they never felt they could fit in. They have sometimes said their clothing was not dressy enough. (Yes, eyebrows can sin.) More often they have spoken of stepping into a church where not a single person spoke to them. Yes, I know, you don't know every person in the church and if you speak first you might find you just asked the president of the church council if he was a visitor. So, have a chuckle and introduce yourself anyway.

Someone looks very sad and might cry? Perfect. Ask if you can help, pray for them, help them get a glass of water or a cup of coffee. Wear your name tags....yes, I know YOU know your name. HA HA  But that name tag actually says "I'm willing to meet new people." and "I know where the bathrooms are, just ask me!"

And not all God's children are in the church building, so take a chance and share a smile. I recently was with one of my favorite people who we tease because he is always making eye contact and speaking to people. He did this at the grocery store Memorial Weekend and I watch a retired veteran who was wholly disengaged and decidedly sad-looking become engaged and smiling. This also provided an opportunity for them to share some practical information that just might make life a little better both of them.

You see, this kindness thing is not kindness if it only goes one way. If we make a big production of speaking to "one of the little people" that is just irritating. But when genuine, honest kindness passes between people everyone feels better for it, even those who just observe it happening.

Where can you give a little mercy, spread a little sunshine, offer a little of God's love using your hands and feet and voice today?

2 Peter 1:7

To those exploring the possibility of a relationship with God​, or being new in that relationship, or being a long-time Christian who has kind of been taking things for granted and never been amazed or overcome with joy or gratitude, this may sound strange. But we who are in relationship with God need to be awed by God. If we are not awed by that then I have to think we are not really paying attention.

It is truly beyond human understanding that an utterly perfect, all powerful, all knowing, always present Creator of all would have the smallest care about us in the eternal blink of an eyelash that is our life. But between the Old Testament and the New Testament and the personal testimony of uncountable people who have persisted in a conversation with God, there is a preponderance of reason to believe it is possible.

And then we worry about being "good enough" (we are not, of course) or "earning God's respect" (we can't, of course) or "wanting to make sense of it all before we consider it possible" (never going to happen). But God says: "That is not the point at all. The point is this: I created you in My Own Image for the purpose of loving Me and for demonstrating love and kindness to others that they also might consider and discuss and open themselves to a life of purpose and joy."

That is all just amazing.

And when we consider this seriously, if we do embrace it at all then we truly need to be in awe of God, reverent in heart and thoughts toward God, devoted to God. Not because God will squash us like a bug if we don't. (God does not.) Rather praise and love and honor God because there is no other reasonable, possible, rational response to such an amazing love and persistent care of us.

O God, create in me a renewed spirit, eternally deepening my desire to demonstrate my love, delight and joy in being loved by You. There are no words to convey my thanks enough, or notes to sing my joy or steps to dance my praise for You. I am daily overwhelmed as You know my heart completely and love me utterly. AMEN  

2 Peter 1:6

We are such impatient beings! We tap our foot, require an iPod screwed into our ear or the car radio playing to drown out the silence. We let our blood pressure jump 20 points because the person in line has twenty-one items and we only have 20 if you count "two for the price of one" as a single item. We have a fit about the rudeness of other drivers while we are distracted ourselves. We want things done on time and right, even if it is only an ice cream cone.

OOOOOoooooh I do hate learning patience. For me it has always been painful because I want to be "over there by Tuesday at 4:00 pm" even it means I fail to show mercy to a slow walker or a lonely neighbor. I want it "now, NOW, NOW!!!" without considering if someone else's need should give way to my want.

And yet, as with most all painful lessons, I have been so amazingly blessed. The people I have been willing to give a bit of my precious time to, to share a few of the many dollars God has given me resources to receive, or to take a deep breath and a pause before I jump to a conclusion or speak impetuously pour blessing into my life. I am still a work in progress and I certainly don't do it consistently or even very well; but the blessings are so powerful and abundant that I am drawn to continue trying to get this "right" more of the time.

It helps sometimes to think how often God with a lesser sense of humor, a temper, or a little less abiding and healing love would likely to take a Nerf bat to my backside to get my attention. And since I benefit so richly from God's mercy for and patience with me, I am increasingly embarrassed to show less to the girl in the drive through or the retiree who parks crookedly in the parking lot. Instead of justifying every err or mistake I make, I'm learning to acknowledge both the err and the inconvenience or even unexpected damage it caused others. I'm more willing to ask for help and wait more patiently for guidance or enlightenment.

And, wonder of wonders, I'm learning to be more patient with myself, not demanding more of myself than God does....you know, that amazing God who keeps forgiving and keeps blessing and keeps teaching and always, always keeps loving. You know, that perfect God who does not expect me to be perfect, because His Son died to take care of all that. You know, that trustworthy God who does expect me to be kind and forgiving and loving and generous as I have been given all that from God directly, showing me that it is in my own best interest to be ever more like God created me to be.

Who deserves to receive mercy today? How about the gal in the mirror for a start? How about your most irritating relative or the work-place jerk? How about someone whose error or mistake or sin has resulted in a relationship with the legal system? How about someone whose sin is not living up to my expectation of them?

2 Peter 1:6

When I look back I am amazed at how little attention I paid to my surroundings for most of my life. I lived in a safe community, attended church school through 8th grade, had loving and attentive parents and extended family. I was a city girl who nearly died running in front of a city bus because I was not aware of my surroundings and that might have given me a clue, but it did not.  I guess I  needed to live in bear country or in an unstable, war-torn country or experience worry about having enough food to eat.

So I was slow to realize that living an aware life results in far more choices (both good and bad) and an increased capacity to experience loss and pain. But the alternative is living an unexamined life where I was defending the limited things I understood or believed I understood rather than examining my assumptions against various learning opportunities. This aware living thing is scary but oh so rewarding as I found how deeply connected I am to folks with extremely different life experiences than my own.

And it is very freeing to realize that God will help me exercise self-control and wisdom in the opportunities I identify, rather than just floating along without regard to choices that lead to more oopportunities. We have challenges aplenty, but we have confidence that not only will we journey with God's love and grace, but we are promised that we can actually find blessings in the darkest of times. I know this seems radical, and it IS radical, because our culture pounds in our heads that "safety" is the only thing that counts. But frankly, few medical breakthroughs or scientific discoveries or great works of art or amazing music or engineering marvels have come as the result of cowering in fear and distress. And then, neither has great kindness or persistent mercy or life-saving generosity.

The only thing better than learning I had authority over choices in my life was learning that I did not have that opportunity and responsibility all alone, but rather these choices and opportunities are part of God's plan for me. I have given up the notion that I will, at least in this lifetime, ever get "it" completely right, but I'm so grateful to understand the power of choices and the comfort of the God who coaches and empower and heals us along the way.

​What in your life would you like to start changing today?

1 Peter 1:6