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a closer walk with thee

7/26/2015

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Today I'm thinking about how we are called to serve God. As I am filling out forms to volunteer for Prison Fellowship and be considered for ministry training through my church, as I schedule training dates for participation in a Kairos Outside and Women's Emmaus Walk ahead of events in October, as I embrace the possibility of being a two car family again and think of the new opportunities it will open and I am filled with joy and hope and love and I wonder why I ever fear to answer yes.

But I also remember times when I have said "yes" too often and come to realize looking back that I had not waited for God's call and wound up over extended and burnt out. And for a period of time I was not generous with my time because I had learned the wrong lesson from these experiences.

But three years ago I had a rather shattering experience...in this case shattering in a good way. I signed up to attend a 72 hour weekend with the Walk to Emmaus community. I had been to retreats before and found them nice and I thought my husband would enjoy it. Yes, I went because I thought my husband would enjoy it. Little did I know! He attended in May and I attended in September. He did enjoy it very much and is a strong supporter of the community. I will say that for me, it lead to profound differences in the way I live out my faith. 

Part of that change is to be fully willing to say "no" if, having prayed about a ministry opportunity, I do not believe it is what I am called to do. No, God does not send an email, text me, phone me or mail me a written set of instructions! But as I have embraced opportunities to draw closer to God, I have found a sense of peace plus excitement (or sometimes near panic) at embracing an opportunity and conversely a sense of dread and a decided anxiety at the specter of doing something else. And sometimes I don't feel I get any kind of answer which seems to mean, not yet or something else is coming. And often It is not so clear and I would LOVE an email laying it all out in minute detail, but each time I work to find my path, struggle to match my will to God's Will, I draw closer to Him and understand more deeply how utterly reliable and consistent is His Love and patience the greater my joy and peace. If I get it wrong, He helps me work through that too.

So if you are longing for a deeper or more connected relationship to God, contact me (contact link above), send a Facebook message or ask me at a meeting and I'll be happy to share more. If you are in the Midwest, we have a men's weekend October 8-11 and a Women's weekend October 15-18. If you are an alumni of Emmasu, El Camino, Tres Dios, Crusillo, Torch, Journey, Kairos or any of the other fellowships in this tradition and a longing to be a servant, let me know that too!

One last comment, if you are looking for a "top of the mountain experience" I can only say that was not my experience. If you looking for more quiet joy and deep grounding, THAT was my experience.

If not this, or if not now, I hope you will still be aware of the many ways God offers us connection with God, ways to minister and serve each other, ways to learn and worship our way to full fellowship with our Creator and Lord.
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    Jann's son was incarcerated.  She longed for a community where she could connect with others dealing with similar issues.

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