On the one hand, I have left a job because the ethics of the business owner and those affiliated left me angry, anxious and more than a little afraid, and I was quite passionate about fleeing. And I am too willing to lobby for others to change their way of doing business in the corporate and political worlds and less enthusiastic about changing my errors and omissions.
Where I fall flat on my face is developing the passion that gets me up early so I can have devotions before my day starts. Or to lay down a good mystery so I can read about ways to grow in my faith. Or forgo something I want to fulfill the need of another. Or eat healthily and walk to care for the body entrusted to my lifetime care. Or be inconvenienced to spend time with some who can't get around anymore.
I do all these things sometimes or for a while. Then, my self-righteous need to "be perfectly good" has had its "fix" and back I go to a more casual approach to righteousness.
So this particular observation of Jesus keeps me on my knees a lot. They all pose challenges, but for me this is a constant companion, longing to long and needing to hunger. I long to be more consistent, less easily distracted, more fully committed.
I suppose it is fair to say that I have made some baby steps over the years, by learning to ask for the gifts of the Holy Spirit: love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.* And by noting instances where those gifts present, rejoicing that the powerful Spirit of God overcomes my human limits.
O, Spirit of God, Comforter and Guide, thank you for stirring in me a longing for a closer relationship with God, inspiring and empowering each bit of progress in that journey. Give me a broken heart so that when You pour out love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control on me, there are plenty of places for it to get in, take root and fill me.. In the Name of Jesus who sent You. AMEN
Matthew 5: 6 Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.
*Galatians 5:22-23